The Astonishing Alchemist - vol. 01

You smile with glee as the heads of the two mooks slam together. Your brain tells you now is the perfect time to make a three stooges reference and this momentarily distraction is all it takes for you to lose track of what your enemies are doing. No longer gifted with super speed you are unable to prepare for the sudden shift in momentum when the driver of the car slams on the breaks. You are thrown headfirst inside the car and your face impacts the dashboard. Hard. The driver slams his foot back on the gas and your are now flung the opposite direction into the backseat of the car. The two men whose heads you clunked together now sit on either side of you and don't look particularly happy. Simultaneously they both ram their tasers into your side, blasting you with another shot of electricity, while the mook in the passenger seat turns around and aims his taser directly at your face.

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Dice Pool Limit - 5
Alchemist - 1 HP
Strength Mutagen Counter: 4

Threat Rating
Boss: Mook Mobile - 3 HP

The Alchemist grabs the wrist of one goon as he jabs with his taser and yanks him to the other side of the car into his backseat companion. The whole thing’s about as awkward as a middle school dance, and nearly as graceful, but what the situation lacks in room to maneuver, it’s made up with sheer power from the Alchemist’s enhanced strength. With his other hand, he drives a punch into the back of the passenger seat, flinging its occupant forward into the dashboard.

"Argh!" the mook up front screams as his nose fractures on the dashboard. The driver looks back with a terrified expression at the chaos going on behind him. He takes his eyes off the road to try and locate his pistol which must have fallen to the floor. When he looks back up his eyes go wide as the road is coming to an end and you're all about to drive right into a coffee shop.

The driver slams on the breaks and turns the wheel to the right as fast as he can. Everyone is sent flying to the left side of the car by the momentum of the maneuver. While avoiding any buildings, the car ends up crashing into a mail box with is tossed up onto the hood and flies back to strike the driver in the face.

The force of the impact knocks the driver unconscious and causes his foot to become a lead weight on the gas pedal. The car jerks forward as the speedometer rises. Let’s hope this street doesn’t end in a dead end.

---

Dice Pool Limit - 5
Alchemist - 1 HP
Strength Mutagen Counter: 3

Threat Rating
Boss: Mook Mobile - 3 HP

"That's it! You did NOT clear that with the Postmaster General! I'm just going to have to turn you in!" shouts the Alchemist as a cloud of mail flutters about the car's interior.

He reaches forward and bashes a backhand fist into the driver's seat. With a yowling screech of metal and springs, it comes off its base and knocks open the driver's side door. With any luck -- not that there's been a lot of that so far -- it'll carry the driver out of the car and slow things down a little bit. No time to worry about that right now, though, not with more knuckledraggers still conscious.

The Alchemist takes the expedient route and punches one square in the face.

The pace of the car quickly starts to drop off as the driver is violently torn from the vehicle. None of his mook buddies seem to worry about it as they continue to punch, kick, and claw at you as best they can. It is increasingly becoming clear that this group is running out of steam as none of their blows land with much gusto and they seemingly forget they even have tasers. With their driver incapacitated and no longer in the vehicle, they are not the same fighting force that originally dislodged you from Folstad’s car.

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Dice Pool Limit - 5
Alchemist - 1 HP
Strength Mutagen Counter: 2

Threat Rating
Mooks: Well Dressed Muscled Thugs --- 2

Feeling his super-strength starting to wane just a little, the Alchemist decides it's time to take care of business. Laughing at the mooks' feeble attempts to take him down, he drives an elbow into the jaw of one, and clamps on to another by the front of his shirt.

"Where's Folstad?! Tell me how to find him, or you'll be seeing stars for the rest of your sorry life!" shouts the Alchemist, holding the mook against the roof of the car, cocking his other fist back to back up the threat.

The car finally rolls to a stop in the middle of an empty intersection. The mooks may not be in fighting shape anymore, but they aren’t prepared just yet to give up the whereabouts of their boss. When you ask the question, a stone faced thug never breaks eye contact as he spits in your face.

Police sirens sound in the distance. They’ll be here in a matter of moments. If you’re going to use any creative interrogation techniques, now would be the time.

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Dice Pool Limit - 5
Alchemist - 1 HP
Strength Mutagen Counter: EXPIRED

Threat Rating
Mooks: Well Dressed Muscled Thugs --- DEFEATED

Optional Threat Rating
Get the Thugs to talk --- 2

"Now, now... that's not very polite! What would your mother say about you spitting in someone's face like that?"

The Alchemist takes a vial from his belt and holds it up, the sky blue liquid inside swirling and scintillating. He lifts it up to look at it in detached contemplation. "Look," he says to the mooks, "I've got one more of these superspeed solutions. First one to tell me where I can find Folstad can have it and..."

He glances over his shoulder toward the sound of rapidly oncoming sirens, then back again. "...get away safely. But the offer runs out in 5... 4... 3..."

Two of the thugs narrow their gaze but don't move a muscle. The last one, however, reaches out for the vial. You close your hand over the vial before he can grab it; making it clear he has to talk first. One of his buddies tries to smack some sense into him, but you're able to intercept their fist and shove them back out of the way.

"We're staying out of town. Heavily guard place in the hills. Trust me, buddy. You don't want to go there." He gives you the address and you toss him the vial. He has just enough time to chug the contents of the vial before the cops swing around the corner.

You don't know the exact address, but the neighborhood sounds vaguely familiar. Hour or two drive from here where expensive houses are built into the mountainside and you don't have any neighbors without shouting distant. Could play into your favor. Might work against you. Then again, maybe you should rest up and try to gather more Intel on this guy before assaulting his HQ. Of course that risks word getting back to him that you know where is at.

As the goon drinks down the contents, there's a silence that stretches only a pair of heartbeats, and then the thug's face goes slack. Strings cut, he slumps to the ground. He even starts snoring for good measure.

The Alchemist looks at the other two and snaps his fingers. "Well, nuts. That must have been the sleep solution. I always mix those two up," he says, clicking his tongue. "I'll leave you fine gents to speak with the authorities. Give them my best wishes, will you?"

He reaches to his belt and throws a tiny glass ampule to the ground. As it shatters with a merry tinkle, white smoke billows up to obscure the Alchemist's quick exit, stage left.

Hopefully the police detain those guys for a while. That was way too close for comfort; I need some rest...

Pausing at the corner of a nearby building, he watches the smoke dissipate in the breeze, checking to make sure the goons are indeed apprehended, and then heads off to find a phone booth. He's going to need a ride home, and he forgot to pack his real clothes. Maybe Alicia's still awake...

The phone rings and rings but Alicia doesn't pick up. Just when you are about to give up, a car pulls up next to you and there she is. Alicia is wide awake and was clearly expecting, if not eagerly awaiting, that she would be needed to help out like this. You hurry around to the passenger side of the car and open it to find... the dog that escaped the pet shop when the windows were taken out. Alicia gives you a dirty look. Quickly, you pick up the puppy and lay it back down in your lap after sitting down. It immediately curls up and starts to drift off to sleep.

Alicia puts the car in gear and then holds up one finger in front of your face. "I told you to make sure you did one thing when going after these guys. One! Make sure those cute little animals didn't become collateral damage. It's a good thing I came out here to keep an eye on you or this little guy might still be wandering the streets." You sit in silence for a moment before she adds, "So did you get the guys or what? Before you went sprinting off it kind of looked like you were getting your butt kicked."

"It's nice to see you too, Alicia," the Alchemist replies blandly. He starts to argue, voice raising for a single syllable before he notices the puppy start to stir in his lap. He slumps back down again, chastised on two fronts for his relative clumsiness.

"Yes, I got the guys," he says finally, though quietly. "One of them told me where I can find Folstad."

He recites the address to Alicia. "Not that I've got anything left to go after him tonight, but maybe we can drive by and check the place out?" he suggests hopefully. "It'd be a huge help, Leesh, really. If you don't mind?"

She gives you an eye roll before taking a wide turn and changing direction. "Fine, fine fine. We’ll just drive by the place." It is hard for her to hide the excitement in her voice.

The adrenaline long since worn off, you drift off during the long drive. Your mind is still focused on Folstad and the battle, leading to a rather restless sleep filled with dreams that remind you how banged up you are.

Alicia gives you a nudge when you arrive... at a gated community. She slows the car down as you drive on the street alongside the 12 foot tall black iron fence that prevents anyone unwanted from getting into this mountainside community. The sleepy looking guard stationed at the entrance gives you guys the stink eye as you slowly drive by.

"I can’t believe we drove all the way out here to just be stopped by a gate and a rent a cop. Unless..." she excitedly looks at you. "Want to sneak in a do a little snooping? Come on, give me one of those concoctions you’re so proud of. This could be fun!"

"No, Alicia. First of all, those goons required everything I had. I’m not even sure I have a vial of mouthwash left."

But the nagging voice in his head (which actually sounds a lot like Alicia) keeps telling him not to pass up the opportunity to do at least a little reconnaissance.

"Second of all, it’s too dangerous. I don’t want you to get hurt."

He looks down at the ball of fur curled up in his lap, then back up to his friend. "Besides, who’s gonna take care of this little guy?". He scoops up the pup, holding it up next to his face and giving Alicia puppy dog eyes...

"I still have the mask on. You... can’t see the puppy dog eyes I’m giving you."

She doesn’t need to see your puppy dog eyes. She only has eyes for the actual puppy. With a frown, she puts the car back into gear and turns back toward the city and home. She drives you back to your place but stops you before you can get more than a few steps from the vehicle.

"Um, didn’t I already tell you I have too many little fur babies at home? No, no, no Mr. Collateral Damage. This guy is your responsibility." The dog seems to agree and jumps out of the car into your arms. He gives a little yelp and wags his tail as you stare down at him. "I’m going to come by tomorrow after work and make sure you’re probably set up to take care of him. Don’t disappoint me. Oh, I guess I’ll try and dig up some more info on Folstad too. Get some sleep you two!"

You crash hard after the long night and awake hours later to the sound of your new pet urinating at the foot of the bed. He locks eyes with you as the never ending stream continues to seep into the carpet. Dominance has been asserted.

Lang sits up, rubbing sleep out of his eyes. He gives the dog a forlorn sort of look and sighs. "You too, huh? Going to have to whip up something to get rid of dog pee, I guess." He twists his head this way and that, wincing at the pop it produces. "Come on, dog. Let's find some breakfast, huh?"

Lang opens the door to his basement apartment and gets the newspaper off the landing. He unrolls it and tosses it on the kitchen counter while he makes some coffee. The pup -- a scruffy brown and white mutt who can't be more than a year old -- paws at his Automatic Aries-branded pajama leg and lets out a small but endearing whine. "Huh? Oh... sorry, buddy. Bet you're hungry too, aren't you?"

He opens the refrigerator and searches its lonely depths for something suitably dog. He peeks inside a lump of aluminum foil and locates some slices of ham. After a sniff and a careful study for mold or other nastiness, Lang decides it's edible for canine purposes. He cuts some tiny bite-sized pieces and swipes them into a bowl, putting it down for the dog and adding a bowl of fresh water. That done, he gets back to the task of making coffee and reading today's headlines.

Your new pet dances on his hindlegs as you prepare his meal. His little tail wags rapidly as he eagerly gulps down the meat as fast as he can while you sit down to check the paper. The headline you read nearly makes you spit your coffee all over the paper.

New Super Villain Assaults Innocents: Are You Next!?!?!

The goons you beat up spun some story to the cops after they got arrested that made them out to be the victims of assault by a masked maniac who chased them through the streets and forced them to drink dangerous chemical concoctions. The reporter didn’t get any direct quotes from the goons or the arresting officers. There is no mention of Folstad or Lloyd Laboratories. Most of the article seems to be spin from their very high priced lawyer and you have no doubt that a bribe must have taken place. The men were released without being charged and a $10,000 reward was offered for information that leads to the masked madman’s arrest.

Well they say there is no such a thing as bad press, right?

"What?! Oh, you have got to be KIDDING me!" Lang cries out, and the dog lets out a whimper at the sudden sound. Lang crouches down and shows him the front page. "Sorry, buddy... but would you look at this? This is a first class hack job! Tell you what, next time you feel the, you know, urge, why don't you go on this piece of trash?"

Still, he can't help but read it through, groaning here and there at a particularly nasty bit of spin.

"Okay. Damage control time. First things first, let's... uh... let's..." He rummages through the piles of papers and junk mail on his counter. "Aww, nuts. Where's that to-do list?"

He puts a couple of pieces of bread down in the toaster, gets his coffee (in his Chemists Do It Periodically mug) and wanders toward the lab, dog following cheerfully behind him. Lang starts up a few reactions to run for a little while, synthesizing more mutagen while he takes care of other things, refills the mutagen vials from stock solutions, and after locking the lab door, heads back to the kitchen for his now cold toast.

"Aww, nuts," he says again. "Maybe I can train you to tell me when the toast pops," he says to the dog. "Listen fella, I've got to go to the library, see what I can find out about this Folstad character. Can you stay here for a little bit? I promise I'll bring you some food and a collar and maybe even a name, okay? Maybe you can stay in the bedroom while I'm gone."

He brings the water dish into his bedroom, and puts an old blanket down on the floor for the dog to sleep on, and with his new friend looking on forlornly, he closes the door and heads to the library before there's too much canine complaining.

You walk through the doors of the San Espero Public Library and are immediately hit by the familiar smell of thousands upon thousands of books. It always brings a smile to your face. You head down to the basement to look through the newspaper records available on microfiche. While you are unable to find any direct mention of Anton Folstad, you do come across a few articles on a Norwegian company called Folstad Productions.

At first you think that there is no way this could be related to the Anton Folstad you had a run in with the night before. Folstad Productions is a film production company mostly known for making Norwegian language avant-garde arthouse movies. But the connection becomes solid when you see a picture from a premier where Anton Folstad is seen smiling on the red carpet.

For the most part, the articles are reviews (which are overwhelmingly positive, at least from critics) of the films they produce. They are known for their surreal plots, inventive cinematography, and integration of motion pictures with new technology.

Their last picture was an incomprehensible film about the lead singer of a death metal band who committed suicide. It followed his journey into the afterlife and required all viewers to wear a specially designed helmet which emitted additional sights, sounds, and smells as the film was played. Foldstad Productions promised to expand on this ‘Living Film Immersion’ device for future projects even though most viewers found it extremely unconformable if not downright sickening. Some viewers experienced headaches or nausea that lasted for days after watching the film using the Folstad Living Film Immersion helmet.