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Wow. I had not expected that kind of answer. Your stories have grown wise over the years. I remember you telling me about the 20 year old a long time ago. You were boastful and humorous, nonchalant. We have changed, as have our stories.

I know the walls that trap me, and I know the fears and heartbreaks that Kili has currently but those will fade. She will find true love, and I have told her up front that I know this and will be heartbroken when it happens even while I will be so happy for her. I live in the present, though I cannot help to fantasize what could have been had I met her in better circumstances. She says she does not believe in multiple lives, and I agree with her, but to think that our souls could meet over and over in all the permutations of time, it would be worth it to wait for that uncanny alignment of stars that meant we could be together. Alas, I know the truth. Still the truth now is that I'm in love. I know the feeling and I want to keep it as long as I can.

Anyone who judges someone by the thoughts, deeds or musings of youth has an agenda, probably one born by skeletons in their closet. We grow, we mature, we reflect, we learn. At least most of us do. That 20 year old is now a 40 year old. She's been a Facebook friend for 10 or 11 year or so. She left me, met a young man in the gym, and got married. He joined the US Air Force, became a pilot and is now a Lt. Col. They have lived in Germany (twice), Greece, Spain, Hawaii and a few places around the US. They have two girls who are their mom's world.
Had she stayed with me, I won't say she wouldn't be happy, but wow, I'm actually jealous of her life, lol.

Online romances are valid. I went off a bit on Claudia a few weeks ago. And, while all the things I said she did were true, the quiet times we shared together, and the tears we shed over life events were all real. We had some really deep conversations and she helped me get through some difficult times. Even Pyro was great because she boosted my ego quite a bit. For some reason she was obsessed with me, even after finding out I was a far cry from looking like my avatar.
Fatima and I are friends to this day. She meet an avatar she fell in love with, took it to RL and they are married to this day. We are FB friends, and I see posts of their travels and gardens and get to share some vicariously through their lives. So it does happen.

Vivian and I had a real chance, but it is what it is, or was.

I do remember how thrilled you were when you met your current wife, and I am sad for what have to deal with now, so trust me, I applaud any escape you can find. In truth, if we all admit it, for all of us (except the Code and Tesh), this game is an escape. A chance to be someone else and flourish in a new world. I loved playing Jacob as carefree, because I'd like to be carefree. He's since taken on the realities of life, even in my second one here. Such is life, but we play the cards we are delt, and pine away for those Aces, Kings and Queens that always seem to be dealt to the fortunate few who were born with attractive faces, bodies and talents.

You may be wrong in one regard. I invited Code and Rubia to the game for similar reasons. They have just gone through a traumatic phase in their own life, having spent years with a challenged young boy that they adopted from distant relatives. They changed their entire lives, churches, schooling, and careers for this child to give him all the love that they could. Despite being incredible parents with two challenging kids of their own, they finally decided that they could not help the adopted child and ended up giving him back recently to the state as a ward. They wear their hearts on their sleeves and this broken their hearts. They have an incredible amount of time now without that child, and I knew they could use an escape as well. The tide rises for all boats.

How is Pyro Gasparini by the way? Still married to the hunk she ? I do miss her. She was a great partner for Diamond City. And did Fatima married her English island investor or someone else? I only met the English guy once to set the prim permissions on my last rental with them, and then I closed my account the next day. I never kept up with anyone. I lost track of Lyric, my last girlfriend. SO funny to be both named Lyric and then meet someone else on our island also named Lyric. Ah the days, lol.

Yeah, Christi. Dude.

I haven't talked to Pyro in a few years. I suppose she's still with Jason. She was wild, but I think it was covering up a lot of insecurity and catholic guilt. Funny how someone so outgoing can be so insecure. It shows in that need to always have affirmation and be in contact with someone. One guy is at work, contact another. That one gets busy, contact another.

Did you know that I met Pyro in Dallas once? She flew in just to say hi. Some friends and I went out club dancing with her, she used my phone to talk to my then SL girlfriend, and then my friend and I shanghaied the waiter she was flirting with and took both of them back to my friends house where I was staying. That way they could have the guest room while my friend and I could talk in peace, lol. She didn't strike me as insecure AT ALL. She was as much her avatar as you can imagine.

Yes, I remember you did that. She and I used to skype quite a bit. I don't mean insecure as in shy. I mean a lot of her IN YOUR FACE DARING and man hunting is a way to... Let me put it this way, no one told more fat jokes in school than me. Humor and a loud over the top personality was my shield. I could hide uncertainty, insecurity and pain through humor. Pyro uses what she has.

By the way, you gave me the Ring of Mind Shielding on my D&D Beyond character, but took a way others I'd had added to it, lol. So I figured if I was going to pilfer something for myself, it should be something you already approved.

How’s your schedule looking again? Sunday or Monday forum night? It doesn’t look like we have a group for tonight besides some side play.

Tomorrow evening and Monday are fairly open. Been a lot of work and family stuff yesterday and today, and a bit more tomorrow afternoon. I'll check in the morning

We are in Nexel where I sent the Elven guard and where Guenavar is at? I need to go check on the guard and get a private meeting with her.

Even if we have to do it later tonight in flashback, I feel it's important. I can't have someone send a secret message for my help, then show up here and not go talk with them.

Trust me, I don't think we will actually get to Nexal tonight, mawahaha. You will have time in Nexal to do what you need to do.

Oh, duh. We are in Baya. Sorry, I was thinking we were there.

You spies tell you that the road to Nexal is dangerous. There are jaguar knights who have gone rogue. Banditry is wide spread. Villages are burned. The orcs are everywhere. Once members of the temple of Zaltec have been transformed into terrible monsters that lead the orcs and ogres. It will be difficult to get to Nexal without a fight.

Kinda wish you were interested in erotic art, lol. A friend shared some beautiful drawings, but all adult themed.

Careful not to suffocate her. She's not fragile, and seems to enjoy that fact. Over protective can come off as and insecurity, and not trusting her to be herself.

Thank you dear friend. I need a good wing man like you to keep me in check. It is my flaw that I love too deeply. I don’t she likes treading in that deep water so I’m trying to stay in the shallow end even while my heart wants to do high dives. It’s not insecurity. On the contrary, it is herself just as she is that attracts me.

She showed me the smile msg you sent. I told her I was going to have to kiss you for that. She wants a vid of that btw.

She told me about a boy that she is in love with. A three year online relationship and he has butterflies for someone in RL. Doesn’t that sound so painfully familiar? Yes, I’ve learned that she is not fragile, but heartache is real and I truly love her. I can’t stand to have her hurt. I think she at least cares about me so we continue to go in as Duke and Kit. Strange worlds we build in this electronic age where we hide from our true emotions. Nevertheless, she is a someone who I find I can’t live without.

You know, as I do, there are three little reasons why that last statement can not be true.

Well, just between you, me and the fence post, let’s debate that.

First, I find it interesting that you use three rather than four. I’ll assume the the four is not a factor in your analysis.
Second, as for the three, it is important to give them most love and attention as possible. Currently they have a single parent who is out of bed and willing to take measures to take care of themselves and seek help so that they can be there for the three? If one parent fails to do this for their children, then would it not be better that another person could? Especially if that person would want that role. Just hyoerthetical mind you.
Third, if the three are the deciding factor in the above dilemma, would not concern outlined in two actually dictate that the three would in fact encourage the above statement rather than hinder it.

Just sayin.

Just sayin' if things don't go as you hope with Kit in RL, it's not the you'll live on, if for nothing else, the children.

Plus, if I were talking to you about a girl I met online a month ago the way you are talking to me about her, I know what you'd thing/say/advise.