When I open my eyes, these things are true: Kiwi is dead, I don't want to be here, and the sun still rises.
Despite what happened yesterday, or maybe because of it, once I fell into the current of sleep, it carried me far and deep. This bed is objectively more comfortable than my own, and Salem's little body by mine kept any chill of night away. Now, though, I'm wondering if I only imagined her.
I sit up, taking in the room in the light of day and inhaling the scent of meat, not briny and sweet, but something distinctly non-oceanic. I can't imagine what. Rat, maybe? If you don't let them feast on garbage, they don't taste like it later. My stomach tightens with hunger, a sensation I've long since conceded to accepting as a faithful friend.
I make the bed, wincing when I move my arm too quickly, shooting pain through my elbow. If anything, the bruise and cut look worse today, but hurtful things often do in the light. I straighten myself up as best I can, smoothing the wrinkles out of the yellow dress and running my fingers through my hair to work out the snarls. I don't relish the idea of leaving this space and starting a day with the Sippians, but avoidance won't save me. Only I can do that.
I wonder if Lucky Strike found my scalpel left by his gun last night. What did he make of it? Will I ever get it back? I open the door and quietly make my way toward the kitchen.
Last edited February 16, 2023 7:03 pm