hey man very interesting question.
As i get older mans propensity for cruelty (to himself and others ) freaks me the fk out. I've always considered myself a civilized person, polite to others, giving people a chance to redeem themselves etc. but there have been moments when disgust has completely overwhelmed me.
Living in za ("Mandela", "Apartheid") and working in construction has put me in very close proximity to the poorer members of our society (both black
and white if you must know) and the thing with poorer ppl (they don't exist in the way i mean in the US) is that they don't have the means to hide their problems.
one of the earliest memories of this overwhelming disgust with humanity or a raw confrontation with humanities baseness was in a place called Marabastadt, its in pta, a collection of close together shops mostly Asian (India not far east).
we were on a rooftop looking down at the "taxirank". i saw a blanket strung between 2 walls (on a corner). I thought maybe they were drying the blanket. one of the guys i worked with "socks" sidles up to me and asks if i knew what i was looking at. I answered that the refugees have probably washed their blankets. he explained "daai is njatsies" (those are prostitutes/fun girls) "hulle verkoop die P**s" (they sell themselves) "fyf rand" (5 rand - current exchange about $0.33 - a go) and as i watched a customer arrived.
I had 3 brothers working for me. the 1st got sick (sores on his tongue) he asked to go home to get better (homelands - a remnant of apartheid group area act) he died, his mother was paid out R50k ($3.2k). A few months later the second brother after a visit home came to me with the exact same tongue sores, he asked to go home - went home, and died. his mom was paid out R50k (insurance we take out for the guys families). when the 3rd brother came to me with the sores, my mother (a matriarch of Irish temper) asked for mothers number, she phoned up the mother and said plainly to her "do you understand me? excellent! If you kill this son i will call the police!" - the last son is still alive.
Then there's the tortures of the farm attacks, you can google them yourselves.
An unrelated personal horror: at the coast (witsand - google it, its a piece of windy heaven!) there's a river, about a km wide that runs into the ocean. We have the largest bull sharks in the world, a lovely lady weighing in around 5-6 hundred Kgs (https://kiteforum.com/viewtopic.php?t=2354575) - interesting story: after tagged, her daily rounds included visiting boats (we call her the "taxman" - 22kg cob heads landed) checking out the shore fishermen(busy wading) and swimming underneath the women that swims across the breede every day for the last 40 years (wonder if anyone has told her yet).
anyway we went to the Infanta side by boat, beautiful! water is as calm as the Med. i took my spinning rod and swam across to the island, not thinking i swam across the channel! looking down with goggles its the fkn abyss (30m on my dodgy depth finder, and swimming it, it looks black and and like it wants to swallow you. i could imagine a tentacle snaking up toward me. made it across unmolested, and began fishing into the mouth. the tide turned and as the water began getting higher (about 1m over the island on high tide) i decided to swim back, my mind was all on sharks and tentacles. i reeled in, put everything away and was just preparing to swim back. As i turned i just about shat myself... behind me was a poor innocent sand shark looking for crabs, but my mind screamed
SHARK!!! :)
Anyway hope this has given you some inspiration.
Reading through your game, the section with tony swimming, had that squirming effect you are looking for. very uncomfortable situation.
looking forward to the rest. enjoy!
Last edited August 30, 2019 8:06 pm
