TWERPS Trashy Tales of Neato Falls

Evan places his C and the 50/50 ticket with his contact information on the bar, and notes to himself to be back at 6pm.

Meanwhile, Julie's attempts to attract the Devin's attentions seem to be coming up short, and she received no response from him. The meat appears to be so deeply focused on his sales schpiel to the ladies at the counter, she wonders if anything could distract him right now.

Evan begins riding back to the hotel, when his phone rings from a local number... It's well before 6pm, and it's the man that was wiping down the bar.

"Hello, is this Mr. E-Van the Artist? Yes, we just called to tell you that we decided to go on ahead an' have the raffle early, and wouldn' you knowit, you won! Congrajulashuns!"

Pulling over Evan took the call and listened... it was probably his artwork around his name that drew the puller of the ticket to his name... there might be hope for the town yet he thought to himself before making arrangements with the man on the other end from the bar before getting back to the hotel to break the good... well news to J and Mr Big Neck.

About the time that Evan walks into the hotel and explains he situation to everyone a loud truck comes rolling into the covered check-in parking area of the hotel in front of the lobby doors blaring a Dixie Horn, not just once, which is obnoxious but still usually succeeds in getting a chuckle from locals, but over and over and over... Seven times to be exact (feel free to turn up the speakers and click the play button seven times to enjoy the interactive feel of Neato Falls in your own room).

The pickup is a boxy, "buy American"-framed model circa the mid-eighties, with a suspension lift kit that seems to make it taller than it is wide or long. It looks like a shitbox made a baby with an industrial cherry-picker that was already somehow its cousin... The color is obscured, as every square inch of the machine is covered in dried mud save for the wiper blade section of the windshield. Two scruffy men sandwich a woman on the bench seat, before jumping out and boisterously entering the lobby...

The men walk up to the front desk completely ignoring the guests in the lobby and the driver uses his outdoor voice to say to the larger woman behind the counter, "Hey Marshey! Ziggy sent us to come an' collect a buncha tourists that paid him to take them up to spend the night in that goddam junk yard they builded outsida town, Haw-Haw!!! Said it's some sissy on a bicycle! You got anyone like that staying here?"

He's wearing torn jeans, heavy boots, and a wife-beater tank top to show off various tattoos he or his friends did with a guitar string and a few ballpoint pens. The art ranges from a popular cartoon rodent grinning while holding an electric guitar and wearing sunglasses with his obscenely large penis snapped in a mousetrap; to a word that was probably "Sally" in blue ink, but then changed to "SoRRy" in heavier blue ink, but then changed back to "SaLLy" in black ink.

The other man from the truck, stands with his elbow on the counter playing with a toothpick in his mouth. Though lacking the lean definition of Devin, he looks fit and wouldn't be entirely unattractive if he'd been were born and raised in a different world than this. His yellow Joe Dirt mullet bobs slightly as he looks the metropolitan-looking Julie up and down with a look on his face that would indicate that 1) he likes was he sees, 2) he disdains what he sees, and 3) he seems completely incapable of any other functions at all while his simple brain struggles with the cognitive dissonance of these two overpowering "emotions".

The girl previously sandwiched in the middle wears full denim from skinny pants to jacket. The only exception seems to be the high-top sneakers with the flashing lights when she walks and the black 80's hairband t-shirt. Her hair is dirty-blonde and large and zig-zaggy from a crimpers and hairspray... She shoves past to the counter between Julie and the mullet giving Julie a dangerous-looking stink eye as she passes indicating that she doesn't like the way Julie's clearly jockeying for the mullet's attentions. Or maybe she recognizes Julie and simply doesn't like the way Julie broke Sammy Breedlove's heart. Either way, she doesn't seem to like Julie and she looks like the type of girl that doesn't post to Chirpbook when she doesn't like another female.

"I think this guy has a bicycle," replies Marshy.

The mullet finally pulls his attention away from Julie to look at Evan and give a snort of derision.

"Well, come on Neil Armstrong! Get your bike and your pit crew and get in the back of the truck!" The driver gives Marshey a wink and they all out to his pickup and as he passes you can smell booze on his breath.

"Bye, Waylon Jennin's Dunphe," says Marshey, clearly enamored with him.

The diver and his friends jump into the front. There's no room in the cab, so you'll need to make a climbing roll to jump into the bed of the truck (with or without your bike, Evan). Due to the absurd lift kit on this pickup this is, ridiculously enough a, minor climbing check as there's no rear bumper or any other means of climbing in beyond a standard Muscle-Up. Feel free to browse the included how-to video on the proper technique to execute a Muscle-Up, then grab the tailgate and make a Saving Roll of (1d10 + Current Strangth) You want to beat the Difficulty Total posted below:

Evan's hands slide off the truck's muddy lift gate and he goes landing on his ass, painfully bruising his tailbone. The truck sways back and forth as the cab becomes a riot of guffaws and hyena barks... Inside, you can hear Marshey cackling behind the front desk.

The Mullet gets out of the cab laughing and with tears in his eyes and helps Evan up off the ground. He grabs him like a groom carrying his bride across a threshold and boosts him into the truck bed. He then stands there grinning and waiting for the other two to give it a try before he offers help. He seems to pay particular focus on Julie.

((Evan loses one point of Current Strength due to a bruised tailbone and injured pride. I'll edit your character sheet for you, Remnant.))