Friends Chat

It's easy to remind you to choose the higher course of action when in my mind, I'm choosing the path of fussing him out for upsetting you or Nate dear lol.

Nate, I don't disagree that he is a horrible human being. I was also a sucker and I'm still trying to deal with seeing that differently than I do. Much like Rod does, I used to fall head first into my feelings for someone else. I fell hard and fast for Drake and despite my mom telling me she wasn't sure about him, I didn't listen. We talked and FaceTimed constantly and he talked of dreams of me and him and my pup together and I was so in love. We played games together, I would send food to him on days when he'd had a long day at work, I met his friends, he met some of mine. His close friend and I had similar senses of humor so we clicked but my friends were weary of him. Nowhere in the commonly used phrase about love makes you see through rose tinted glasses do they add on that those same glasses have blinders. Our first real disagreement was when his true colors came out. He refused to FaceTime with me (we were long distance) and he chewed me out, pointing the finger at me as the problem in the disagreement in a very offensive way. After about a day or two, I told him how hurt I'd been by what he did and somehow I ended up consoling him instead of him comforting me. All of our disagreements were either about something small/insignificant or because I'd spoken a belief/thought that contradicted his own. Any time they happened, he'd shame me and blame me, insulting me, and then ignore my calls or texts for on average two weeks, sometimes one, only to explain that he didn't want to break things off, but he was still angry and then barely acknowledge me or would give me a cold shoulder with every statement. If I did anything that wasn't with a female friend or my parents, he would ignore me. Whenever I went dancing, which he knew was my literal happy place, he'd get jealous and pissed off. He actually made me feel anxious to go dancing because I started for a bit to feel like I was doing the wrong thing by going and enjoying myself knowing that it made him so uncomfortable. I couldn't see the manipulation he was working until it was too late. I'd stopped hanging out with or talking to all but one friend, a female. I was walking on eggshells about almost any and everything. We actually broke up because he was babysitting his best friend's dogs during 4th of July weekend and he left them in his backyard while he ran to the store. He was gone for all of 10mins but, being the dog lover I am and at the time owning my pup MacKenzie, I was appalled that he'd even do that (he lives in the desert and this was the dead of summer). It wasn't my dog so I just said that I'd hope you wouldn't do that to my pup, to which he confirmed he would. When I simply stated that it would upset me that he'd do that after I had expressed concern for him doing so with someone else's dogs, he got pissed off. Told me it was his house I'd be in and it'd be his rules and if he decided to leave my (very furry, predominately black furred) dog outside while he ran to the store, then he would. I asked him to calm down and that just fueled the fire. I never raised my voice, insulted, cussed, anything that could've been taken as anything other than calm, semi-quiet speech, but he worked himself up that he said he was done with me, asked me if I had any last words, and when I asked him to take a breath and let's talk about it, he hung up on me and blocked me completely. I was torn to pieces, he'd done this one other time, but when he didn't come back, it hurt like hell and I was shattered mentally and emotionally drained from him and the heartbreak. I'm way too sensitive for my own good when it comes to the heart. He'd always unblock me every three or so months to re-establish contact with me for a very short time (two weeks to a month) only to get pissed at me again for some tiny reason and then block me again, insulting me every time he blocked me and every time he unblocked me because he knew if he did, I'd get upset and respond because of the words he'd label me with. That was all last year. It wasn't until this year that I truly started to see what he'd done and I started listening truly to my mom and my friends who all said that they watched me become a shell of a person while I was with him. That relationship caused a lot of damage. I stopped dreaming, I hated love or anything that portrayed it (songs, movies, shows, etc.), any time anyone showed interest in me I just waited to find out what they wanted to use me for. It took a long time for me to get angry and actually evaluate our relationship and his treatment of me to see he just wanted a sexual slave to dominate and abuse 24/7 and when I didn't match that, he tried to create it.

That was a lot more than I meant to write, I apologize! I guess my own tendency to overshare and the fact that you'd shared your life trauma caused me to feel like I should share mine too. I'm also sorry sweetheart, I know I've explained that relationship to you before, but I don't think I've explained it in quite this much detail so please try not to be too sad for me. It's caused a lot of walls to be built around myself and my heart, but I am the best I can working to remove the unnecessary barriers and try not to be so guarded.

Okay, super sad story out of the way. Now to address all the other things from your post Nate lol. I figured after I'd written so much, I'd break up my post so it's not awful to read. I'm honestly happy that I decided to study SPED! Even if I just become a teacher aide in a SPED classroom, that's enough for me. When I was working on my bachelor's in psychology, I was asked by a friend to join the ASL class. Her and another convinced my department to host the class, it was the first ASL class at that university in like 10 or 15 years, and she wanted the class full so the department would continue to offer it. Having the electives and the interest, I agreed. Two-thirds way through that semester, I called home and told my mom I'd found what I wanted to do (I had no interest in psychology, but I didn't get into the college of math and science, which was what I'd intended to go to school for, meteorology). She told me if I'd finish my degree since I had one semester left, her and my dad would help me find a school to study ASL from and that's what happened. I did my internship at one of the deaf schools here and I fell in love with it! I still would like to get my interpreting license, but I really love working with kids and I think that my calling is in that direction.

As far as photography, I prefer animals and landscape. Candid when I'm taking photos of people, but my mother usually catches me and immediately stages hers lol. When I turned 18, my parents sat me down for my birthday and told me instead of buying me a gift, they were giving me $1,000 to spend any way I chose, which was out of the ordinary. I'd never received that much money before and any birthday money was always halved and put into saving and the other half to me (they worked hard to teach me to save money). It took me about two months to decide on buying my first professional DSLR camera. "Red" has been by my side since 2011 and it's still one of the best purchases I've ever made! I edit my own photos and I prefer to keep them as realistic as possible.

As far as ballroom goes, I grew up a dancer. My mother was a dancer her whole childhood and almost worked for a ballet company when she turned 18. When I came along, I took to dancing as well and I was practically enrolled from the moment I could stand. I did ballet, tap, and jazz up until around the age of 12, when I had to cut back on doing so many different activities and I (quite stupidly if I do say so myself) decided to stop dancing. When I went to college, I really struggled with finding a crowd to hang out with and feel like I had a reason to not be in my dorm room when I wasn't at class or eating. I went to try out for the ballet team and got rejected. On my walk back to the dorm, I saw a sign for salsa lessons in the ballroom and decided to check it out. I enjoyed every second and joined in the lessons. After that, I was ecstatic! I absorbed everything I could, I did every lesson I was allowed to, even talked my way into joining the lesson with the professionals that I truly was not at the level to learn yet, but I'm quick on my feet with learning so they didn't mind me too much. It's been my constant hobby, my true escape from everything, my happy place on earth, and I hope one day to start taking formal lessons again and maybe even compete again.

Also Nate, Mr. Nate? I'm not sure how formal I should be, southern manners are kicking in lol. Please don't feel the need to apologize or overthink or need to explain yourself. You are more than welcome to just be you. No judgements, no problems. Talk as much as you'd like, explain as deeply as you want, as long as you don't feel bad about it. I understand the paranoia to make sure your intentions are clear, but I promise you, if I don't understand something, I will state that and/or ask a lot of questions! I will probably ask a lot of questions anyways because that's quite typical for me to do lol. I know it'll take time for you to not feel like you have to do those things, I don't expect that to change instantly if it ever does, but I do want to make sure that you know you don't have to be concerned as far as talking with me goes. *heart emoji since I can't seem to make chat show them*

I wanted to interject that I am selfishly loving these long posts since I’ve heard these stories only in broken and incomplete chat and phone calls. This format allows me to essay the whole experience. As such, I feel I owe one of my own stories that may or may not relate. Kitty, you called me out as falling fast, and you are are correct, perhaps with the implication that I wear my own rose colored glasses, again not incorrect. This world we live in with its online relationships is still wondrous and strange to me. I had fallen in love before, learning and teaching university classes in Second Life. I knew the dangers and pitfalls of online relationships and even bringing those into Real life. I wished to avoid those situations. The irony is not lost on me, that in avoiding the trap, I laid another for my heart.

I had set up Maztica as a way to reconnect with Jacob and my old DnD buddies in a strict format that allowed long distance role playing using PBP. As I was resigned to being the caregiver to both three children and an invalid wife who couldn’t even touch me, I sought only to occupy my mind and entertain my friends with the adult version of a game that I had written and DMed for the kids. Maztica for me was written around a fragment of canon lore that has remained unresolved even in fandom since its introduction in version 3e. It involved a certain goddess of love and a god of peace in a tangled tale of trickery, lust, reconciliation and revenge. I’ll have to leave this part vague as it would all involve spoilers in the game. I interwove delusions by Christi to make the story more fantastic an deep. As long I had sat and listened to those delusions as they developed over five months, those three years ago, I figured I might as well write them down in story arch form. It could lead to a novel I contemplated writing and even movie rights lol. My personal goal was that I wanted to show the kids some aspects of their mom’s insanity in a relatable form to them, while keeping the story light, playing pirate against vampire and noble savage against mermaids. As the kids lost interest in spending the amount of time involved to develop this overarched story, I shifted back to the PBP and convinced Jacob to play outright. That’s when I had the brilliant idea to invite Nate, because I knew he had just recently dealt with similar demons and would perhaps have the time then to therapeutically play as I did. He brought in Tina, who I was ecstatic to include, and Jacob brought in his brother. All of my high school friends who had taught me DnD were already overbooked in campaigns. The game was out of balance so I opened it up on gamersplane and I interviewed a few but found none that suited. I had promised Tina that I would find another girl to play and I needed someone who would commit to a story based role play. Kitty applied and then backed off when she saw how intensely I wanted to play, but thankfully I explained the format was simply intended to be similar to reading a romance novel on the sofa. At that, she was hooked. Being the gatekeeper, I asked three questions three. Ginger candy or rich chocolate? Fissy soda that tickles the nose or dark run that warms the heart? Fast dance or slow? Her answers were maybe chocolate, definitely rum, and an enthusiastic fast dance since she was a ballroom dancer. Not only did I accept her as a player, I was already smitten.

Long story made a bit shorter, I spent more time in back story than I ever thought possible. I used Tina‘s busy schedule as my excuse to draw out the back stories, but Jacob knew before I did that I was losing myself in Kitty’s story. Having been invited by me to be a tenant in my island city in Second Life ages ago, Jacob knew much more about online relationships than I, so we shared a great deal about them. I insisted that it was a story, but the whole experience gave me strength and insight into who I was and who I had become.

Nevertheless, the whole experience of the game and my insistence on spending my time after story time on the game gave me a focus and hobby to my otherwise catatonic existence. Not happy with the status quo, I soon found that I needed to do something in real life to improve things, so I shined up my spine and started talking to Christi about renewing efforts to heal herself and getting back on a path of recovery. To convince me that she was perfectly healthy, she revealed to me that she had continued to develop the delusions that caused her the break three years ago. Not only that, Christi was asleep and she was now Zelda. Needless to say, I panicked. I was betrayed. Y’all all know the story from there in too much detail.

Last night I talked to Zelda about what I needed to do to stop enabling her illness and to start helping her. As she is insistent that she is not crazy, the discussion ended quickly but she then suspected me of abandonment, of attempting to steal the kids, and of divorce. She insisted on seeing my phone to check that I had not recorded her conversations, and I admitted that I had and have already uploaded them to the cloud. She immediately attacked me with my own Paladin’s sword. She accused me of breaking my oath and her trust. I stood there bleeding in my own emotions of regret and self condemnation. Nate and I have talked extensively about being fallen Paladins in this regard, but it still hurts to hear it thrown in my face. I had warned Kitty that I was going to broach this subject and she was prepared to calm me down afterwards and helped me sort my thoughts and emotions. I am gaining resolve but it all hurts very badly now.

One thing she said group chatting earlier with her gaming friends resonated with me. A great deal of people come to the games not just for entertainment but for outright escape from horrible things in their lives. I’ve known this for quite some time. I left Second Life to go back to learning to social dance without an animation plugin. I hope to get through Maztica with some healing, too. But still, it hurts and will always. But still we comfort each other. But still, we figure a way to acquire something from the experience and move forward.

I have at least a years’ worth of Maztica written in my head. Maybe more. The choice of ending is still vague. The true villains have not revealed themselves as yet. But the heroes stand beside me, my friends and family. I thank you all.

Real quick, just wanted to say that I've been busy today. Neither of you has scared me off. And Tina's been overwhelmed by some other issues, which is why she hasn't been participating much. So... don't read into that. :)

Well, I just set a trend for sharing the sensitive stuff right away, didn't I? lol.

I am glad I didn't scare y'all away with that. Of course, it was still the watered down version where I didn't get into the details of the ways that Alyster traumatized us, because it's hard to believe or understand without living through it. We may share some more of that, someday, but it's more depressing than y'all need to hear right now.

I'm going to, once again, answer in random order and probably forget to respond to something, and then kick myself later for not acknowledging or talking to something. But that is who I am. Also, I will probably keep overcompensating and overclarifying. You can ask Tina. I still clarify things that are just barely ambiguous, right after saying them out loud. Things I KNOW she will know what I meant. But there is a compulsion around accuracy that I have. One that I have managed to get halfway decent at suppressing when the inaccuracy occurs while someone else is telling a story and an insignificant detail is incorrect. I used to interrupt Tina and correct that. Irritated the hell out of her. But she's awesome and forgives me and stuff.

As for the headbutting with Jacob - I must say that it's not entirely his fault. I own some of the responsibility, and I'm fine with admitting that. I feel like, sometimes, he does try to retcon his reaction and play it off as not annoyed when he was, or something like that. Hell, we all do, don't we (speaking in terms of humanity in general)? And so, I will do my best to let it roll off, but sometimes I will get in a mood and get snarky, or be a turd. I'll get over it. And I'm sorry I got all upset and morose early on, when I kept dying over and over and over again. I was feeling useless and like I was more of a burden than a help to the team. And I didn't handle it well. Nor do I handle getting confused well, lol. But y'all have been great about accepting me, and helping me back to the right mindset in the game, or encouraging me when I'm being mopey. That's one of the reasons I already felt like I would like you, Kili. Because you made an effort, even if it was in character (and sometimes out of character) to make sure I was okay. That meant something. Especially in the world we live in today, where I see so many people caring only about themselves.

Which, I guess I should warn you, I'm a bit passionate about people treating other people with respect, no matter how they may differ from themselves. That sentence was not easy to craft, and I still don't like it, but I think you probably know what I'm trying to say. I suppose I am what some would call a social justice warrior, but I don't see that term as being in any way negative. I'm a Christian, but not the judgmental, condemning everyone who thinks differently than me, type. If you are on facebook, I'd like to friend you (Kili) on there, but I'd also want to warn you that I post some stuff that is often seen as political. Not that I mean it as political, necessarily. I'm moreover passionate about truth and justice. And, well, I just cannot stand what Trump has done to this country. Again, I hate to bring politics in here, and I don't want to. But... I just thought I would get that out of the way. I don't care if people are Republican or Democrats, those labels are just poorly defined and applied groupings. So are conservative and liberal. All of those things. I don't care about that. But Trump... I don't care what party he represents, he is just a horrible person.

So, I feel like I probably have not offended or driven you away with that. Because you seem like a good person. But at the same time, I know people who I think of as good people, and yet they still support Trump, so there is a small chance that I just broke this budding friendship. But, as I said, I will be upfront and honest. And I won't bring up politics out of the blue again. I just wanted to warn you that if we did become friends on Facebook... well, I go on rants from time to time, about the injustices I see. And a lot of them seem to fall at his feet lately. ANYWAYS, uncomfortable tangent over with, let's move on to something else.

And then... the next thing that pops into my mind actually could be called political. Isn't that ironic? But it's simply this: on average, men suck. A lot. Men are horrible, awful, dirtbags. On average. I am probably classified as a male feminist. Because I am sick and tired of the way men treat women. What happened to you, and has happened to many women, is vile and repulsive. And entirely blamed on him, in my opinion. And, I'm going to offer some unsolicited opinion, because this is another thing I'm passionate about, so I'm sorry if it seems out of place. But I hope that you know that none of that situation is your fault. None of it. Zero. He is entirely responsible for who he is and what he does. Could you have possibly broken out of it sooner? Doesn't matter. Because he was the one doing it. I've seen friends and family members go through similar things. And, unlike many people who judge from the outside, I know that the men who do this to women know how to do it well. I don't know if it's instinctual or what, but it is vile and repugnant. They convince you, slowly, that you deserve it, or that you don't have a chance for better, or many other things. It is a deep and dark type of manipulation that is very hard to escape. And when people do escape (because, in reality, it does sometimes happen the other way around, gender wise, but rarely), it is often driven by how the abuser acts towards someone else, much as it was about the dog for you. I am so sorry, as a representative of the male gender, for how you were manipulated and used. It's disgusting and should never happen, but happens all too much. So... yeah. I'm not sure what you'll make of that, but... men suck. And it's nobodies fault but theirs. And I am glad for you that you were able to break free, but also understand that it's something that will be with you for a long time. And that pisses me off that a guy was just fine with that.

I hope you don't feel like I'm taking a tone of condescension or "wisdow" or anything like that. I say all this knowing that you may very well already know all of it. But sometimes it's good to hear it from other people. To know that you are not "crazy" if you think things like that, and you are not alone. That goes for anything I say to either of you, Kili or Rod. I know that I can get into a method of speaking that may sound authoritative or lecture-like. Especially about things that are... important. But I'm not trying to teach anyone, or say that I'm right about everything. I'm just speaking my mind, and hoping that it can be helpful in whatever way it might.

Rod... I'm so sorry that you were called out last night as breaking oath and trust. That had to hurt. And though you probably know in your head that the trust and oath had already been broken by her, that doesn't mean that it doesn't feel crappy. But I will still remind you that you are not to blame, either. Your action of recording her was for her own good, as well as that of your children and yourself. It is not breaking an oath or trust. It's keeping a commitment, and doing what is best for those you are responsible for (and, in this case, what's best for her, too). She may not see it that way now, or ever. But when you start to doubt yourself, question your actions, remember that you did not do this selfishly. You spent years trying to work within the constraints, and she withheld from you the further development of the psychosis. You asked her to make an effort to heal, and she was unwilling. She will clearly not seek help of her own accord, so taking precautions like you have is prudent and in her best interest. Of course, that's all logical, factual, information, which doesn't help a lot with the feelings. Just know that we are all here, and we see it all, and we do not judge you, or find your actions lacking in love. We do not see an oathbreaker. We do not see a fallen Paladin. We see someone trying to do the right thing, even in pain and suffering and hurt. Even when the right thing is really hard, and the person you are doing it for does not want the right thing. As fallen as you feel, you need to remember that all Paladin's are fallen to begin with. We are human. We are fallable. It's the choices you make, in your fallen state, that show your true Paladin character.

Like you said, I count as much as a fallen Paladin as anyone. But I try to do better every day. And that is the true character of a Paladin. Trying to make the world a better place. Not being a saint in the first place and never failing. You are a Paladin, Rod, whether you see it or not.

I think that's enough for now... my son is wanting to ask me a question, and I have rambled on for quite a bit, so... good time for a chapter break, right?

Nate, I’ll tell you. Kitty and I are arguing over who would marry you first, if we met you before Tina did.

Hahahahahaha! You wouldn't want to. Tina is more than half the reason I am the person I am today. She has taught me much, and we have both grown together to see the world more truly than either of us was raised to see it. Not that our parents had bad intentions or anything. But I have honestly thought about how, if not for her, I would be the poster child for nerdy basement-cave dwelling computer ogre. She is the one who is really and truly awesome. She's just rubbed off on me. Along with putting up with me. Cause I was not easy to live with, and it is hard for me to change habits and absorb new social practices.

If overcompensating and clarifying is your default, then by all means, be you. I just wanted to make sure you didn't feel a need to do that solely because we're getting to know each other and might not pick up on those context/personal cues that we all express when we know someone well. I also hope that whatever Tina is going through gets easier and/or better soon!

I'm glad that I was able to help, I was really trying to! And I get the frustration, it was a bit hard to keep up at first and constantly going down would've had me feeling the exact same way! But honestly, you're one of the best characters in the campaign! And we all have a great joke now about you laying down on the job lol. I love our Mountain Man so much, he's the character I reference the most whenever Rod and I are in our subforum. We both kinda honestly enjoy maintaining the fun of the roleplaying our characters privately so as to not upset those who don't enjoy that as much as we do. *Sorry love, going to spill this as well because I can't NOT share the hilarious Storm reference I made!* So Duke proposed having an actual wedding ceremony because we didn't have that we we vowed to be husband and wife, to which, of course Kit said yes to. But the thought that I had as I was writing my response was this: "We should totally ask Storm to be the flower child! Just imagine his 7 foot something tall body walking down the aisle dropping pedals with a flower crown on his head. You can't tell me that's not the funniest thought!" Sharing all the love for your character is my way of saying that I'm really glad we were able to help and that you stuck around with us!

It might be a bit before I add people on Facebook. One of the reasons I don't really use it anymore is that my family gets a bit intrusive and nosy on my page and feed. I live at home so there's not much privacy lol. But honestly, the political talk doesn't bother me. I'm the same way, the parties are just groupings. I've been so angry in the past couple of elections because I don't usually listen to the debates and such, but I hear the ads everywhere on TV and YouTube. I get so tired of the slandering and fearmongering that candidates do now instead of spreading awareness of what they believe in and support and what they can actually do for us. Being a social justice warrior shouldn't be negative, we should all be trying to do that with our times currently. Fight those injustices, more of us need to be! But yeah, I hate Trump too. So no possible friendships ruined! :D

A lot of men suck, yes lol. I do know it's not my fault that he did that to me, but it's hard to remove that mentality that it is. I work on it little by little though to try to correct that mindset and I know that'll take a long time. It took a year of being broken up to finally put my foot down and say "I'm tired of your abuse, don't talk to me again" and actually block him from being able to contact me. I hate anyone who does this no matter what kind of relationship, couple, familial, friends, doesn't matter. It's uncalled for!

And feel free to speak your mind, there's no thought of you being condescending or anything of the sort! I appreciate that you would offer your thoughts and advice, especially as someone who does the same.

And he's right dear, I told you last night too that you're not the oath breaker here, but I know it hurts and we're all here for you and we all love you!

Oh the mind just created a thong of flowers and that was a horrible sight! Lmao

My work here is done. 😉

I am so sorry to just be getting caught up with everything, but I loved reading through this and getting to know everyone better. I have been in a bit of anxiety overload this past week. I made a trip to Texas to visit my parents last weekend, and it turned out to be unexpectedly stressful moreso than relaxing. My parents, though I love them dearly are Trumpets, so when I found out that one of my female attorney heroes had passed away right after I got to their house, I had to run into the bedroom and do a little private crying (because I didn't want them to ask why I was upset and things devolve into a messy political discussion). And then my dad told me that he had an irregular stress test come back and some additional heart problems they found when they ran more tests. He is only 61, but he is basically a walking health problem, God bless him. Lol So this whole pandemic has been extra stressful for me because I worry about him. Anyway, I am feeling better now.

I would like to reiterate that it has been such a pleasure playing the game, and I love the way you soften interactions but also maintain your badass goddessness, Kili! :D I have been trying to keep the vibe for my character consistent, and I picture her as much more authoritative, a bit more uptight, and quieter than I in real life. Rod mentioned that he has had to reassure the other players that I am just joking when I make some of my sarcastic or irritated replies in the game. I was so surprised that anyone took my jabs seriously. Lol I am not sure we ever really see ourselves the way that others do, but I think if we met in real life, you would be able to tell that I am all bark and no bite, so to speak. Except, of course, when somebody messes with kids or animals, then it's on! Lol I grew up with a very abusive mother whose voice still rings in my head quite a bit. That's one of the reasons Nate is so good for me. So, I kind of morph back and forth between what I think is my natural personality of authoritative, passionate, outspoken, and "bossy," and my learned/trauma personality of people pleasing, high anxiety, perfectionistic, hypervigilant shy girl. Nate can correct me if that isn't quite accurate, but I think it's close. I sometimes think of it as my attorney personality and my non-attorney side competing for dominance. Lol Nate came up with a strategy for dealing with my anxiety by giving me big hugs and telling me that I am not a failure until I start to believe it. Cause he's the best like that. :D At this point I would like to add that "I am the winner!" I found him, and I'm keeping him. Lol I am very lucky to have him. He is super supportive, as well as sweet and kind, honest and fair, and so many other mushy descriptors!!

Anyway, let's see. More about me is that I have always loved animals. I thought for a brief time that I would grow up to be a veterinarian, but then I realized that my great dislike for blood might be problematic. . . . So, I had to find a new dream. Lol I got to college, still unsure of what I wanted to do when I grew up, but soon ran out of gen Ed requirements and settled on Spanish. I love the language and learning about the many cultures that the language represents. However, it turns out that when the college assures you that you can do all sorts of things with this degree, other than teaching, that is less than accurate. *eye roll* So, I endeworking for an adoption agency after college that was run by a semi-crazy attorney. I realized that I really liked the law, and if Mr. Crazypants could make it through law school and pass the bar, I was pretty sure I could too, by golly. So, here I am, living the dream of being mostly unemployed while I stay home to homeschool my kids. But one day I will be able to rejoin the work force more and make the moderate bucks that law school promised! Ha ha! And thanks to Nate, I am not a crazy dog lady. Lol

So, Kili, how much more do you have to go for your degree, or are you looking for an assistant teaching position now? Are you from NC, or did you just end up there? Your southern manners are on point! Lol

And Rod, I don't know that I can add anything meaningful to what Nate already said, but you are SUCH an amazing man and a wonderful, devoted father. I used to tell the other parents at co-op that if anything ever happened to Nate and I, our kids would want to go live with you. Lol Kili, if you didn't know, Rod coached a robotics team that our son was on, and it was pretty much his favorite thing ever. He has also taught a variety of math and science classes to both of our kids at our homeschool co-op. They adore him! And I adore his kids too. They are so bright and have such great personalities. And, of course, Aslan's freckles are, indeed, to die for. :) I am definitely a better and more well-rounded person for having known you, dear Rod.

See! I told you she was most of the reason I am who I am today! She's the real deal! And... personally, I have trouble thinking of her as shy, because she's an extrovert. But a reserved extrovert. She doesn't open up easily, but thrives on human interaction.

Wow Tina! You are too kind. And your kids are welcome to come live with us! Only if y'all come too! We will start a commune, complete with robots and hamster tunnels to the various bedrooms and playrooms and virtual reality projection rooms and wildlife petting room and multiple pokemon training gyms. It would be a riot. I would build a three story library and art room for Izzy and a paintball course for Aslan and a flying simulator for Ike's bedroom. I'll do the kitchen and servery. I'll need to add a TikTok greenroom studio, too.

I'm sorry to hear about your trip and your dad Tina but I'm glad you're all settled again! And thank you for the compliment! My character was supposed to not have a sensitive side to her, but the backstory and a bit of my own self ended up creating what she is, which is honestly a close version of myself minus the lack of confidence and tons of self-doubt.

I do have to admit that I was one of the ones who was a bit concerned about your character lol but I did come around and realize that it was just the way your character was. I honestly love it, I thought it was hilarious when you huffed at Duke for petting your wolf form and looked at him with the "never again" glance. I can say that I can relate to the tendency to be overly protective to children and animals. I'm sorry about your upbringing, I can't fully understand, but I do understand having a difficult relationship with your mother. But you two are absolutely precious, you and Nate! You two sound like a dream couple!!

I would be a crazy dog lady myself to be honest haha! And yes, Rod has very excitedly told me about all of the teaching he's done, with pictures of the outfits he's whipped up lol! This should be my last year in my degree, but I have been seeking teacher assistant positions until the pandemic hit. My mother and I are immuno-compromised and her health is terrible so any job that requires leaving home is a risk. My dad doesn't work from home, but has his station at work set up for very minimal interaction and we have strategies for when he gets home to keep us hopefully not having to come into contact with it if it ends up on his clothes. In the mean time, I'm just looking for anything I can do that allows me to work from home. I've lived in NC my whole life in the same area. Even went to college in a city that I have family in. I have traveled a lot within the states though.

And I'm sorry, Pokémon training gyms? Why am I just now finding out that you're a Pokémon fan? I will bring my water deck and my DS with my Pokémon games and my Pokémon mod for Minecraft to play all the Pokémon ever!

The gyms are for Zeke, their oldest. He and I have often talked Pokémon Go but that’s about it. He would eat you up Kitty.

Oh nice! I’ll bring my Pokémon GO account too!! I actually got both of my parents into Pokémon through the app. My mom screamed with excitement the other night when she caught a shiny Pokémon, it was adorable.