Lessons from Games

Feb 5, 2025 2:47 pm

What is a lesson you have cherished, having taken from a game to use as often as you can?

For me, the way FATE tells you to create NPCs and Locations. No matter the game, I do best now when I take a note card and write three notes about the [NOUN], such as a physical description, smell, etc. I also add in what they want and what they know, some of which are applicable in different situations, but always short and sweet and bullet points.

Feb 5, 2025 4:14 pm

Chandler's Law

Feb 5, 2025 5:59 pm

Put the things you like into your games. NOTE: Some of these apply only to in-person games.
You like to cook? When the characters stop in a tavern, have a stew you can share with the characters to heighten the experience.
You like to craft? Make some terrain for your game. Your players will be amazed and appreciate the effort. Or hand make a puzzle for your players to actually move around with their hands.
You like to write music? Why not try writing a heroic them for your characters or an evil sounding song whenever the BBEG or his minions how up?
You like to draw? Sketch up some character art. Draw specific examples of key items or creatures the players encounter.

TheGenerator

Feb 6, 2025 8:27 am

Lessons from Games

As a player -
Put the spotlight on your fellow players. I often find it's more fun to give the final blow or the solution to a puzzle to another player. Especially if it corresponds with their character's expertise. Try to be each other's number one fan. Do the setup for someone else to be awesome.

If the game allows for it, don't be afraid to do dumb stuff. Even if you know the perfect solution, your character might not be so knowledgeable. If it ends up working out, it will be memorable. (Of course try not to sabotage the team in the process)

Last edited February 6, 2025 8:28 am

BedzoneII

Feb 6, 2025 9:09 am

Lessons from Games

Powered by the Apocalypse taught me the middle category: success, success with a cost, failure. I now often apply that to systems that are straight success/failure rolls, ie, if someone misses by 1 on the roll, I'm inclined to allow a partial success instead.

Adam

Feb 6, 2025 9:14 am

Lessons from Games

Ooops. Wrong thread.

Last edited February 6, 2025 9:22 am

Nebula

Feb 6, 2025 9:17 am

Lessons from Games

For me is to make sure the veils and lines are clear with everybody from the beginning. I got kicked without warning from one of my first games on GP because i wrote about a theme that bothered other players. It created a lasting bad impression between me and the other players/GM unfortunately.

Relatively new to PbP it was all unexpected to me.

Last edited February 6, 2025 9:18 am

Adam, like a therapist, but clueless

Adam

Feb 6, 2025 9:59 am

Lessons from Games

A big problem with all games, IRL and PbP, is burnout. I think there's a mental health lesson too, although it's one that I'm not qualified to teach because I don't know what works for you (and wouldn't it be weird if I said I did?), and I don't know what the nine-hells I'm talking about, but I think I know what works for me.

I find that I feel happiest when I stay in my comfort zone. Comfort zones are comfortable—the clue was in the name (duh!). Outside them, it's uncomfortable. And there's nothing wrong with being comfortable when you want to relax. The rest of my life can be puzzling things out, but in my free time, I want something familiar.

So if I don't want to suffer burnout then I need to stay in my familiar places. For me, that's D&D 5e on the Forgotten Realms' Sword Coast, ideally with published modules. I run the same games over and over (e.g. I've run three Rime of the Frostmaiden and three Hellrider games) in the same Forgotten Realms locations (Icewind Dale, Waterdeep, Baldur's Gate, Elturel, Phandalin). As a player, I want to play on the Sword Coast. I don't mind playing with new people, in fact, I prefer that, but I don't like learning new rules, new lore, or new genres.

This was something that I had to learn about myself, and almost certainly doesn't apply to you. But I think there might still be a lesson. What kind of games make you happy? What makes you anxious and liable to burnout and ghost?

If you're comfortable playing only with the same friends, then don't let anyone tell you that you should be playing with new members. You know you 'shoulds' better than anyone else. If people are pressuring you to GM or play a certain game, and it's not one that will bring you joy, it's fine to say no.

What's the lesson? Dunno. Perhaps audit the things that make you uncomfortable or anxious and don't do those things? That sounds simple and obvious, doesn't it? So why did I find it so hard to implement?

Adam, like a therapist, but clueless

Nebula

Feb 6, 2025 10:36 am

Lessons from Games

Right. RPG burnout is a thing, it's hard to find the right suitable number of games and be disciplined to don't over do it. I would say the vast majority of players on PBP are addicted to begin new games as players or GM, and most of the time get into trouble or keep on having too many low quality games that cause them stress and anxiety because they can't keep up. It's really draining.

Adam says:

A big problem with all games, IRL and PbP, is burnout. I think there's a mental health lesson too, although it's one that I'm not qualified to teach because I don't know what works for you (and wouldn't it be weird if I said I did?), and I don't know what the nine-hells I'm talking about, but I think I know what works for me.

I find that I feel happiest when I stay in my comfort zone. Comfort zones are comfortable—the clue was in the name (duh!). Outside them, it's uncomfortable. And there's nothing wrong with being comfortable when you want to relax. The rest of my life can be puzzling things out, but in my free time, I want something familiar.

So if I don't want to suffer burnout then I need to stay in my familiar places. For me, that's D&D 5e on the Forgotten Realms' Sword Coast, ideally with published modules. I run the same games over and over (e.g. I've run three Rime of the Frostmaiden and three Hellrider games) in the same Forgotten Realms locations (Icewind Dale, Waterdeep, Baldur's Gate, Elturel, Phandalin). As a player, I want to play on the Sword Coast. I don't mind playing with new people, in fact, I prefer that, but I don't like learning new rules, new lore, or new genres.

This was something that I had to learn about myself, and almost certainly doesn't apply to you. But I think there might still be a lesson. What kind of games make you happy? What makes you anxious and liable to burnout and ghost?

If you're comfortable playing only with the same friends, then don't let anyone tell you that you should be playing with new members. You know you 'shoulds' better than anyone else. If people are pressuring you to GM or play a certain game, and it's not one that will bring you joy, it's fine to say no.

What's the lesson? Dunno. Perhaps audit the things that make you uncomfortable or anxious and don't do those things? That sounds simple and obvious, doesn't it? So why did I find it so hard to implement?

cowleyc

Feb 6, 2025 3:23 pm

Lessons from Games

I've learned that rules and players are my comfort, over setting. Easy rules that I can remember. Shadowdark is the best example of this, Black Sword Hack is another. 5e is the opposite, since it has so many subsystems that work differently.

When running a game, it's important to me to remember "Not every player is right for every table." I find comfort in players I vibe with, which is why part of my recruiting process involves snagging a few right off the bat. It helps give the feel of a table of friends. Probably because it is.

As for the Burnout, that's definitely a hard one to navigate! Especially since not all games are created equally! I'm finding that running three or four (though leaning towards three lately) and playing in an equal amount works just fine for me! Past that, I get nervous about missing updates or forgetting to post. Doesn't lend to a good gaming experience.

TheForsakenEvil

Feb 6, 2025 4:47 pm

Lessons from Games

Blades in the Dark taught me that you don't always need a dramatic reveal for excitement. There doesn't need to be some mysterious happening in the background that the players discover to their horror. It can be equally exciting when they know exactly what's looming over their characters, inching ever closer. The characters may not know what horrible thing will happen the longer they will take on their quest, but the players can. A clock from the GM openly providing meta knowledge is an exciting tool that I always look for the opportunity to use.

GMing Shadow of the Demon Lord taught me that even if players say they're cool with the contents of a game, they might very well decide later on that they aren't. That's totally fine, even if it does suck when it happens. Sometimes you just have to roll with the punches when people find out things they thought would be fun aren't in reality for them.

I've also learned since I started GMing that maintaining creative inspiration for multi-year long campaigns is a very difficult task, at least for me. Don't dilly dally when trying to implement cool ideas you have. Building up to something cool is all well and good, but if it takes 2 years to do so, then it's probably better to accelerate your timeframe. I'm sure that advice is less meaningful for a slow format like play-by-post, but I think it's important all the same. In the time it takes to get through a multi-year game, I will have likely had dozens of inspirations to bring to the table. Letting those inspirations flutter away and feeling chained to an idea you had two years ago is a disheartening experience. Don't let time get the better of you. Indulge yourself in your creative inspiration while they're still fresh. Of course, this is just advice that comes from my experience. I'm sure there are folk who love running the same game for a decade, but I know it ain't me. So, YMMV.

Qralloq

Feb 6, 2025 5:14 pm

Lessons from Games

Feng Shui taught me never go shopping for bullets. That happens off screen, you don't need to waste precious game time with things that don't matter.

This leads to a second revelation reinforced by DCC modules: always use your best ideas first. You don't need to build up a multi-session arc to lead the players to that one set piece battle you've been dreaming of. Lead with it, and trust yourself; there will always be more awesome ideas.

Phil_Ozzy_Fer

Feb 6, 2025 5:36 pm

Lessons from Games

I'm not sure how to answer this. My general takeaway from gaming is to ensure I plan a certain amount of flexibility for my missteps and failures as a player and GM. I am inevitably error-prone while playing, whether it be misreading a rule, underpreparing for enthusiastic players (sometimes you can't just improvise!), or something else entirely.

As for a specific game, I think 13th Age taught me to prioritize what's most important and leave everything else out. The core book was written with stuff players were expected to fill in on their own, i.e. cities with no names or information in the official setting, genealogies that just sort of trail off as questions in their descriptions, travel montages, etc. Conversely, there are rules like "One Unique Thing" or the use of Backgrounds as a kind of narratively generated skill modifiers (i.e., a PC's background as a bodyguard that applies as a bonus, but only in specific contexts) that seem so small but add so much to make PCs stand out.

Legendary_Sidekick

Feb 6, 2025 6:03 pm

Lessons from Games

For me…

Lesson #1: Choosing Games

I can’t play a character I hate, so pirate games are a huge no. They’re evil. Not morally ambiguous. Evil. When I feel sorry for the NPCs that my own allies kill, it’s not the game for me. (Hi, diddily-dee / it’s not the game for me) I gotta play the good guys who fight the bad guys. I don’t mind innocent NPC lives being lost through player failures or even when we, the heroes of the story, arrive mid-action and witness murderous monster attacks.

TL;DR - Dark settings and campy settings are both my fun, but for dark, I prefer PCs are like the shining light.

Lesson #2: Running Games

I’m a shitty shoddy writer. If I run a game, I’m much better off making cheesy plots that are unpretentiously an excuse for action. I can just let loose and if players stick around, I guess I’m doing something to hold their interest.

Lesson #3: Walking away from Games

[ +- ] 5¶ Essay - PbP Griefers

I’ve learned (on other sites) that when people are rude online, they feel empowered. They know they’re always right. Just ask, and they’ll tell you. Don’t ask, and they’ll tell you.

I have met my share of the PbP equivalent to griefers. Basically, players who treat other PCs like their verbal punching bags. The punching bag is supposed to take it: be the butt of whatever joke, out-of-the-blue meanness or my personal favorite: the italicized dis (So-and-So is an @$$ that keeps on $#!%ing) so they can act like their PC is suddenly above it all while in reality, they just wanted to make a comment everybody can read and nobody can react to.

As for what your PC can react to: any response or lack thereof puts you in the wrong, and it doesn’t take much for passive-aggressive "observations" of your PC to pop up in OoC discussion and/or PMs to circulate attacking your reputation.

Lesson learned: if you’ve seen them treat three other people this way, you saw the red flags long before you became the next target. Don’t RP in kind, thinking it’s just IC and meant in fun (or thinking that one small taste of their own medicine will result in them checking their mirror, and your PCs can talk about that and mend the fence). Don’t let the actually-fun parts of the game become the excuse for complacency and tolerance of what honestly feels more like cyber-bullying than role-playing. Don’t try to fix it (unless the other expresses interest. Then try once). Don’t think "we’re all adults here" when an irl-manchild actually RPs his self-insert throwing a temper tantrum or his character slaps your character, ignoring dice rules and just god-mods you getting slapped because they’re at least half-right that you won’t escalate a non-damaging assault into in-party combat. Make the first time a PC yells the F-bomb in your PC’s face the last time. Make the moment another player tries to control the narrative of your PC the cue to narrate your PC walking out of the game. Do not stay out of respect for the GM; if he respected you, he would have mediated as a neutral party.

Walk away without a word, IC or OoC, that can be twisted against you.

ThatTaoGuy

Feb 10, 2025 5:41 pm

Lessons from Games

Setting up my enemies/situations as "Fronts" that I took from Dungeon World.
Setting up clocks with specific things associated with each step to escalate off screen actions/plans so I don't have to think about them all the time.

Also, that I love games that focus on character, interpersonal drama, and story rather than resource management, the level ladder climb, and balanced encounters. I think I knew this in the back of my mind all along, but finding games that focus on the "fun" parts of my character, like Smallville, Alien, etc. really makes a game enjoyable to me. Especially times when things like fear take over in Alien and my character does something dumb.

It turns out the whole zero to hero thing got old for me. I just like playing characters who are competent from the start and don't become god-like by the end.

bowlofspinach

Feb 10, 2025 7:26 pm

Lessons from Games

Somewhat related-ish, when I first found Smallville, that game was what made it click for me that RPGs don't just need to be varying degrees of 'physics simulators', but if what your game is about is relationships and character motivations, then you can just make your mechanics about those instead of about jump height and lifting strength.

Harrigan

Feb 11, 2025 4:53 am

Lessons from Games

Marvel Super Heroes showed me that presentation matters.

GURPS taught me that so many genres can be fun.

Champions taught me the joy of character building.

WEG's Star Wars taught me that licensed RPG don't have to suck.

Underground showed me what impact art could have an an RPG, and how fun social issues could be to explore in an RPG.

Heavy Gear and Jovian Chronicles showed the power of the combination a slick system (Silhouette, so underrated), high-end, consistent art and enthralling sci-fi settings that drip with plots hooks.

Feng Shui showed me the way for how to describe, run, and facilitate cinematic combat scenes.

Fudge taught me to love the DIY ethic.

Fate opened huge vistas for me, from aspects and consequences to success at cost and failing forward and a whole bunch of other innovations. (It took Core to really pull it all together.) The mechanics weren't just focused on combat, but could encapsulate... everything.

PbtA games taught me about genre emulation and being a fan of the PCs.

And now the OSR has bread-crumbed me back home, to a pure, minimalist, black cave I'm loathe to leave.

Last edited February 11, 2025 6:35 am

WhtKnt

Feb 11, 2025 5:54 am

Lessons from Games

Always be willing to try something new. There are several games I now enjoy that I might otherwise have passed over due to a lack of interest or arrogance that it "wasn't the game for me". Thus, if the story is compelling, I will try just about anything once.

Len

Feb 11, 2025 6:02 am

Lessons from Games

Traveller taught me to embrace randomness in character creation, and imparted a love for open-world sandbox campaign play.

Rifts taught me not to play Rifts.

nezzeraj

Feb 11, 2025 7:38 am

Lessons from Games

Damn I'm going to steal Harrigan's formatting!

Shadow of the Demon Lord taught me that randomly creating characters is more fun than building from a preconceived idea.

Numenera taught me that games can be a completely different experience depending on if you're a GM or player, and also how much more fun I have when I don't have a hundred rules to focus on.

Burning Wheel showed me that sometimes it takes a few sessions for a game to really click and you can understand how many systems can work together harmoniously.

Mausritter showed me that I hate not rolling to hit.

Delta Green opened my eyes not to judge a game before I try it.

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