The Tomtom Hunt

The Tomtom prances through the snowy yard, chuckling to himself. He capers and cavorts in the wintry wonderland, determined to stay one step ahead of his would-be pursuers. With a wiggle of his nose, he dives into a snowdrift and disappears. The hunt is on!

Parish steps out the door of the Bed and Breakfast and puts a gloved hand to his brow. He looks out at the trackless white snow and wonders where the wiley gremlin is hiding.

"This reminds me of the last voyage of my grand uncle Ernie Shackletoad, a great explorer. He was in the race to be the first of his spawn to the South Pole and spent over a year trapped in ice while being stalked by a great white snow beast. I had planned to accompany him on the journey as the third mate. But instead, the fourth mate had been promoted to third (for political reasons of course) and instead I languished in port, making ready his grand return. I was crushed at the time but in hindsight, it was a blessing as grand uncle returned half the frog he left. Quite literally."

He continues gazing off at the horizon, drifting along in thought. He adjusts his old suit of armor he had put on underneath his warm jacket. It fit a bit snug around the waist, but he had managed it. Having to don long underwear beneath it to keep the metallic chill off his skin hadn't helped matters either. But this would be a glorious hunt worthy of such accouterments.

"Well.." A familiar voice said from beside him. Somehow Yazeba was already outside, dressed in a warm cloak, a woolen witches hat and dark purple ear muffs. She had already noticed the Tomtom during the night. "Are you going to stand around and reminisce, or are you going to actually take action?" She says with a sneer.

She had been trying to hunt down the Tomtom for many years now. That little pest kept ruining her day every time they were around! Not this year, she vowed. Her fury building up inside. She was in a bad mood and someone or something was going to suffer her wrath this day!

"It's not just going to give up, you know." She adds, still talking to Parish and rolling her eyes. "I swear, without me nothing would get done in time around here."

"Allow me to ameliorate the situation," Amelie offers, flexing the shiny arm that was just reattached last Tuesday. From that shiny arm is what appears to be a bear trap. But it’s better than that. (For one, it has a safety feature so the jaws won’t crush the tiny fey’s legs.)

"This is FoPTooL." The maid-bot adjusts their grip on the chain in their hand. It extends so that the bear-trap jaw-thing drops to the floor.

"ARF ARF ARF," says FoPTooL.

"Finder of Prankster Tontons on our Land. Go, FoPTooL," Amelie commands!

FoPTooL replies, "ARF ARF ARF ARF ARF," and pacmans forward, munching the little clog-prints in the snow!"I am recording through FoPTooL’s eyes. Not the eyes I painted on the bear trap’s upper jaw, but a hidden camera eye in one of the holes I drilled that look like nostrils." Not that anyone asked, but "the other nostril is for FoPTooL’s voice."

"ARF ARF ARF." The munching motion is much faster than the arfs.

FoPTooL leads Amelie into the woods. After a few minutes, you hear a faint, musical drumming from the woods, as if someone were dancing on a tree with wooden shoes. The drumming continues for several seconds before the sound fades away.

BOOM!

One of the trees in the woods crackles as a gnome-sized hole goes straight through the thick bark. Not far away, Yazeba stands with her index finger pointing towards that exact tree, which collapses under its own weight and falls just in front of the residents to create an unexpected blockade.

"Darn, I think I missed." Is all Yazeba says.

As the echoes of the falling tree fade away, you hear another commotion from behind you! Following the sounds back to the B&B, you find the garage door open, and Sal’s van blasting its hi-beams and country classics over busted radio speakers. Oh, that rascally Tomtom!

As they return from the garage, Parish realizes the fallen tree blocks their path toward the woods - and Amelie!

"Egads! We must catch up to Amelie, Yazeba! Never split the party!" He rushes to the tree and throws his weight against it. Although heavy, the snow helps it move easier and he is able to spin it out of the way.

"*huff huff* I seem to have dented my armor a bit. Nothing to be concerned about. *huff* I'm sure I can get Percy to hammer it back into the proper form."

As Parish bravely rescues Amelie, the knight spots the Tomtom's pointed footprints leading deeper into the woods. They then turn straight up the trunk of a tree and into the canopy!

"Amelie can take care of themselves. This is no job for the weak!" Yazeba replies to Parish's plea to stick together.

"Now where did that bugger run off to?!?" She says irately. "Ooooh if I get my hands on this Tomtom..." Blue flames can be seen by anyone brave enough to look her in the eyes right now.

"Amelie, Parish, go around and flush that gnome out towards me." She tells her fellow hunters. "I'll take care of the rest."

Amelie goes around as ordered. And they have a great idea: Pyromancy—Yazeba likes magic, and it will work to our advantage! I can create Stealth Smoke! Let me see… reverse vacuum-arm, internally-monologue the magic word in Morse Code, dash-dot•dash-dot•dot•dash-dash-dotdotdot…, and set power to

BOOM!Unfortunately, the maid-bot seems to have lost their magic touch. Aside from burning their pompom hat to ashes in the wind and vaporizing every flake of snow in a twenty foot radius, no harm done.

And there is smoke. Lots of smoke. It’s the stealth that’s lacking.

As the smoke clears, the Tomtom is still nowhere in sight. But you can see his pointy tracks traipsing through the garden, in and out, in and out of the Rabbits’ holes!

Amelie follows the footprints! "After him!"

As Amelie moves off in pursuit of the Tomtom, their metallic foot triggers a hidden tripwire. Suddenly, a barrage of snowballs flies through the air, slamming into Amelie's torso with cold, wet thuds. The snowballs form the shape of a big, smiley face!

"Oh. He got me."

Amelie can’t help but admire the cleverness of the fey. They use their pyrotech to melt the snow and dry off.

Yazeba coughs and waves her arms, trying to get rid of the smoke. "Did we get him?" But she already knew the answer to that question. The Tomtom had once again outsmarted them. When it finally clears, she spots Amelie making their way across the grounds in pursuit of their target. A silvery glint hovering at ankle-height reveals one of the Tomtom's tricks.

"Amelie don't ... " But it's too late the snowballs are already flying. Yazeba sighs. She walks up next to Amelie as they are reheating their core temperature and rubs her hands as if getting some warmth by a fireplace. "Well, at least your 'space heater' skills are working." She comments sharply. For a moment it seems like it could have been a compliment, but the look on her face makes it pretty clear it's not.

"He went that way." She says, looking at the prints in the snow. "Perfect."
Earlier, Yazeba had set up a little trap of her own. Knowing that the Tomtom will get up to their usual tricks, she decided to provide a taste of their own medicine. Near the swing in the garden she had put a bucket of pine cones. The Tomtom always loved to throw them at any passerby when the opportunity presented itself. But this time they'll find a very sticky surprise! The pines cones have been bewitched with a sticky-spell and will stick to anyone who touches them.

Yazeba discovers the sticky pinecones are missing from their bucket! And not only that, you can hear the sound of wooden clogs clomping from somewhere nearby. The trail sends onwards, but the Tomtom can’t have gotten far!