The Pancake War

Instead of continuing down the field track, Yazeba glares at Robin for daring to attempt to poach her underling teammate before stomping over to check on Amelie.

"Flickering fuses," she curses as she gives her a once-over. "Nothing wrong... Fickle circuits... Heat-sensitive fuses... Honestly..." she mumbles nearly inaudibly as she works. When Amelie inevitably reboots, Yazeba looks her deep in her frontal sensors and says seriously, "You are not a servant. You're just not allowed to disobey direct orders. Now, continue your task and continue to gain territory."

With those conflicting statements made, Yazeba retreats back to the lonely field track.

---

Meanwhile, Robin continues to do his best, despite his previous gaff. He takes a few deep, cooling breaths before continuing forward.

One of Robin's teammates (Hey Kid?) comes up from behind as Robin is moving forward and stuffs a pancake into his hand. The pancake begins to burn in his still-too-hot fingers and Robin panics! His first instinct is to protect the pancake from further damage by throwing it as far away from his fiery body as possible!

SPLAT.

Unfortunately, that turns out to be straight into Yazeba's retreating back. The witch's head turns ever so slowly, her eyes as large and luminous as a very angry owl. Robin freezes, his outer skin hardening protectively as he's caught in her glare. Hey Kid's hotel had better work out because he's not certain he'll be invited back inside Yazeba's hotel after this!

"Oh, dear! Shots have been fired!" Yola Oleander cries as Yazeba is hit by the pancake. "Who would have thought it would be our dear, sweet Robin who would launch the opening salvo?"

"I just hope he hasn't started something he can't finish. Hell hath no fury like a witch scorned," says Lady Sherry, rocking in her chair and sipping her tea.

Forget the field track. Yazeba has been gravely insulted and can't allow such things to stand! She does an about-turn and strides back to Amelie. "Really, Robin?" she says, her voice low and menacing. "You want to escalate?"

Robin doesn't reply. It's not because he doesn't want to, but he's rather locked himself in place. In the battle between fight or flight, he has clearly chosen option 3: freeze.

Yazeba takes another step forward, not intimidated by the lava elemental in the slightest, and tries to claim territory.

Yazeba waves her hands and cold wind swirls around her, whooshing forward to blow at Robin. Predictably, this does not successfully push him out of the way. Instead, it solidifies him even further; Robin is absolutely not budging from the path.

"Frozen fusspots!" Yabeba swears. The wind stills as Yazeba calms her magic. Perhaps a more mundane approach might be called for... "Alright Amelie, you're up," she says. "I believe in you and whatnot..."

Suddenly, Hey Kid rushes out of the Hey Kid Hostel, grinning maniacally. Their apron is splattered with pancake batter and their hair is a mess, but they seem to be having the time of their life. "Don't worry, Robin! I'm here! Let's show that mean old witch we mean business!"

Hey Kid darts through Robin's legs as they claim the territory along the deck path. Standing face-to-face with Amelie, they look up at the robotic maid and gesture with their spatula. "Bring it on!"

Amelie attempts to proceed forward. She pulls out a floppy disk and says, "Downloading new skill..." A meter shows on her face as the skill downloads until it finishes and she says, "This unit now knows Kung Fu!" and proceeds to use the newly acquired skill to toss Hey Kid.

Unfortunately, Amelie does, indeed, "bring it on." Hey Kid may have the speed, but Amelie has the strength and kung fu skills! The robot plucks the devilish child up by the apron strings and casually tosses them back towards their hostel before moving forward to where Robin stands guard. "Oof! Hey, no fair! Robin! Dog, Dog, n'Dog! Get 'em!"

Dog Dog N'Dog growls and jumps into the fray. All three heads tugging on one of Amelie's legs as the adorable three headed pup does its best to pull her back down the path.

Hey Kid's team is rallying. This is unacceptable. Yazeba crosses her arms and in her most commanding voice tells Dog, Dog, n'Dog to SIT.

Dog, Dog, n'Dog does not sit.

...

Yazeba remains standing and glaring. Her foot taps impatiently as she waits for Dog, Dog, n'Dog to comply.

...

Any minute now. A good trainer knows that you only give a command once!

...

"You are a bad dog," she informs Dog, Dog, n'Dog. "And you!" She turns to Hey Kid. "I'm warning you that you can only keep that mutt if you train it! Show some responsibility for once in your life! The only reason this has gone on for so long is because my 'teammate' can't even keep her power on!"

She whirls on her heel and stomps back to the porch. Leading from behind is more her style anyways.

Hey Kid sticks their tongue out at Yazeba's retreating back. Then they grin and pat Dog, Dog, n'Dog on the heads. "Good boy! Hold the line! I'm gonna help the Rabbits!"

The fiendish child high fives the Rabbits as they push further ahead into the garden!

Amelie proves Yazeba correct as she says, "Apologies mistress Yazeba…program protocols continue to fail. Please repro…." She doesn’t even get the last line out as she shuts down again.

Yazeba lets out a strangled cry of frustration. "Fumbling for-loops!" she grumps. "Maybe I really should do some debugging..." She changes trajectory slightly, aiming for the garden path to head off Hey Kid's team where they're currently frolicking through the fennel unchecked.

Before she reaches the track, however, Yazeba notices the delicious breakfast tray Parish had so carefully brought out at the start of the battle. She reaches deep inside for her power. She should stay on the porch, shouldn't she? Running around doesn't seem to be doing much good, and it's highly undignified. So Yazeba pulls the cart over to the stairs and takes careful aim.

"Foes a-fire!"

The breakfast cart goes sailing off the porch, its wheels frantically turning in a shower of green sparks. It's only as it hits the ground that Yazeba realizes her mistake; The breakfast cart was not built for off-roading! Eggs begin shooting off of it like popcorn as the cart makes a mad dash toward the gardens. It loses one wheel to a pothole, the next to a decorative rock Hey Kid insisted on placing directly in the middle of the path. Finally, it spins out and comes to an inglorious halt just beside the carrots, a trail of breakfast debris in its wake.

As Amelie shuts down and Yazeba sputters, a light laughter fills the air. Monday emerges from the B&B, wings fluttering as they alight beside the witch. "Oh, dear me! You seem to be having some trouble, Yazeba. Don't worry, I'll give you a hand. We can discuss the price of my assistance later."

Smirking, Monday moves to the garden to try to halt Hey Kid's advance.

Hey Kid smears blueberry jam on their face… intended to appear as streaks of woad, but of course they overdo it, leaving only a single wedge of unjammed flesh from forehead to left nostril.

They mount Dog, Dog and Dog, and raise a jam-stained spatula overhead.

"The oppressor may have taken some ground. But she will never.. take… OUR PANCAKES!"

A rabbit in a kilt looks at a rabbit in a plaid schoolgirl jumper. The schoolgirl rabbit exchanges shrugs with Kilt Rabbit, who says, "I dunno. She does have a kung-fu robot."

"Aw, blow it out your bagpipe, Kilt Rabbkit! I’m trying to rally yous guys!"

Kilt Rabbit takes the cue and plays his bagpipe. "NNNNWWHHIIRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNNNNN…!"

It’s extremely difficult to hear anything else Hey Kid says as they ride their trusty steed back and forth before the gaggle. Only the loudest words are intelligible:

"Somethingy something FORRRR..?"

The gaggle replies, "Peace," "Freedom,", "Pancakes," "Something," and "What?"

Hey Kid points to the opposing team. "AND WHO something something?"

The gaggle replies, "Her," "Them," "You," "Us," "Not her!?!" and "Louder!"

Hey Kid shouts, "SOMETHINNNNNNNGGGGGGG….!!!"

Dog, Dog and Dog ride forward—The rabbits follow, shouting "BWWWWAAAAA!!" in order to amplify Kilt Rabbit’s overbearing, discordant amateur bagpipery, which is sure to drive the witch and her ilk away. (Their sensitive bunny ears can barely tolerate it.)

Hey Kid rides forth, but Dog, Dog and Dog buck mid-pancake toss!

The pancake hits Kilt Rabbit’s bagpipe.

"FFFRRRMMMTTTwwwrrrnnn..*"

The other rabbits stop BWAA-ing and look at each other awkwardly. Schoolgirl Rabbit slowly back-steps…The rest of the rabbits follow her.. and quickly, they ALL get hoppin’!Hey Kid shouts, "Don’t run away! Run that way! I didn’t put all this jam on my face so we would lose! AAAAH!! It’s in my left eye and *snerk* right nostril! WHYYYYYY??!! EVERYTHING IS UNFAIR!! The wind totally made my pancake fly the wrong way! ‘Wind’ should be called ‘losed’ cuz IT RUINED MY MOMENT!! That moment was MINE! MINNNE!!!"