Level 2: Need Another Hero, Girl and/or Sprite

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"Lieutenant Kirk’s the name," says the guard, trying to be subtle himself. "Used to be Captain."

He notices Casanova hasn’t touched her drink. He slides his over.

"Absinthe," he tells her.

Bart Ender places an odd utensil on the glass with two sugar cubes on it. They suddenly erupt in a blue flame.

"Strong stuff… I’ll understand if you’d rather a glass of milk, which is all Hero Sword Guy ever orders. But… you could just hold the glass, if you’d like."

The burning crows change course to eat the confetti, giving Pira and opportunity to rush the scarecrow! But the scarecrow (a.k.a. Yellow Knight) gets bangooed over the head by Thundra’s weapon. Pira kicks the pitchfork instead!

The pitchfork is headed straight for THUNDRA!

YE CHICKEN COOP
With Thundra’s uncanny ability to walk through a corn maze in a straight line, she, Pira and the Princess can avoid the Manure Men, the ten-foot pole with a burlap horse-head on one end and a three-woman-saddle in the middle, and a jug of moonshine labeled DRINK ME.

Eventually, a Thundra-shaped hole in the cornstalk wall (which retains its shape even when tops of stalks are severed with nothing to hold them up) reveals the chicken coop. The breaking of clay pots and bok-bokking of chickens is heard inside.

As for the outside…



…the entire coop rises on giant chicken feet!!!

Meanwhile, Kurumi observes the card game. It seems like it would be endless, but then, there are only twelve minutes in a day.

The sun sets in the west, and at the same time, the moon rises in the east. The men are about ready to put their cards away as Wild Bill splits his winnings (an overfilled bowl of peanuts) evenly with his friends.

Lenny Loserhand shells a nut. "What do you think The Night’ll bring this time?"

Sleeve Ace shrugs, "Who knows? Things haven’t been the same, y’know?"

Lenny and Bill nod. Bob Questgiver looks as if he’s got something to say, but he notices Kurumi. "Oh, I’m sorry, Miss. I was so engrossed in the game I derdn’t… rumm. Rait a rinute?!"

Bob looks at his hands and— "Ruh, roh!" —they’re paws!



It’s not just the four at the table. Bart Ender is a were-dog as well. So is everyone else (except Kurumi and Casanova)!

"Rell, riss is riff’rent," balks Chatty Cathy as Lenny gives up his seat for her.

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Missy Girl (a.k.a. Absinthe) tries to tell Casanova more.

SURELY YOU’RE AWARE THAT I’M THE FAIRY THAT USED TO HELP THE VILLAGERS OF CITITON, AND THEY WANT ME BACK. BUT AS LONG AS A HERO IS THER

—the absinthe spills, cutting off Casanova’s contact. The fairy’s shadow fades to obscurity as the wisps dissipate. And the guy in the next barstool, Lt. Kirk, now has the face of a pug.

"Roo rook her array rum me. Repair to rye!"

The were-dogs at the card table seem to be struggling for control, except for Chatty Cathy, who answers Kurumi’s question:

"Revery right is riff’rent. Rast right, ree rurned into rotted rants. Rhuh right refore, ree riched renders." She's about to tell Kurumi about two nights ago, but all the male dog-people start barking noisily.

There seems to be an obvious ring leader. He’s an Alpha Were-Dog. You can tell he’s superior to other were-dogs because he doesn’t start almost every word with an R when he talks.

"Sic her, boys," says the Alpha.

"Ress RIR," say the male were-dogs.

"Ruh-roh," says Chatty Cathy.

The were dogs attack!

YE CHICKEN COOPA very shiny black beak (large enough to swallow a person whole!) protrudes from the window of the chicken coop—and the beak exhales FIRE!!!

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

The corn wall starts to POP POP POP—and in seconds, there is only popcorn and ash separating our heroines from the oversized chicken in the notably-less-oversized coop.

Our heroines can try to tell it to kneel, but from the way the flames reflect off the beak and the legs, it’s apparent that the chicken is made of iron. Does being made of metal change things?

One change is certain—the chicken’s attention is on our heroines. It’s charging forward! The only disadvantage to its size is that one can easily sense the danger faster than the creature can get to her!