The AMEL-3000

"Oh, goodness gracious me," Amelie says as they see Yazeba smoking in the laundry room. "I apologize for my tardiness. My mahjong game with three of the Hey Kids lasted five minutes beyond schedule. But not to worry, I always schedule buffers between tasks, so I can finish the laundry and still have plenty of time for…"

Amelie rounds the bend as they speak. They immediately stop speaking when they see themself!

"Oh… I seem to already be folding the laundry. Ahead of schedule no less."

SO THIS IS WHAT I LOOK LIKE

Oddly, Amelie does not feel jealous of their replacement? Assistant? New boss? Someone like me?

Instead they watch their likeness folding clothes. They can tell what clothes are intended for what bodies. Demi’s dress is pretty. So is Sal’s skirt. They understand Sal is breaking a rule that does not apply here at the B&B.

People can be what they want to be, they realize.
WHAT ABOUT ME? WHAT DO I WANT TO BE? AM I ALREADY THAT? TRULY?

AM I HAPPY WITH THE WAY I LOOK AND DRESS NOW?

AMEL-3000 loading laundry skill module...complete. Continuing customer service interaction protocol.

"Do not worry that you are late to the satisfaction survey, unit designation Amelie. I will stop by to ask Hey Kid to rate the enjoyability of playing mahjong with you. Thank you for the opportunity to gather that additional data point."

Activate facial display panel to display ^u^ emoji. Complete. Play marketing statement vocal. Playback in progress.

"At AmelCorp, we strive to provide the most enjoyable service models for our discerning customers' needs."

Customer satisfaction protocol resuming

"I have already begun with the folding which you can see has been improved in the 3000 models to use the latest advances in topology which increases folding speed and density of folded clothes by a net +2.35%."

Mess on floor identified. Engage sweeping module.

AMEL-3000 goes to sweep up the ash from Yazeba's cigar. But the witch appears more exasperated than grateful at the responsive cleaning. Does the user not want efficient cleaning? It would be possible to return later to clean the ash, but that is extremely inefficient. AMEL-3000 returns to folding laundry, silently pondering.

Amelie corrects AMEL-3000’s math.

"Plus two point thirty-seven percent."

I HAVE BEEN SLACKING

"You comment has been recorded and appended to the Customer Satisfaction Report, supporting material section." Well at least Amelie noticed my folding AMEL-3000 thinks to themself.

Task Designation - Laundry completion at 25%. Continuing Laundry.

AMEL-3000 looks at Amelie and smiles. "Shall we continue with the laundry? I would be happy to assist in any way that you need. Would you like me to begin ironing?"

AMEL-3000 goes over to a set of clothes prepped for ironing and takes out a shirt, draping it over the ironing board. They hold their hand flat, and lock their wrist joint, then the hand begins heating up. They run the iron hand over the clothes, a mist of water shooting from their fingers when needed, efficiently smoothing out all wrinkles and getting perfect creases.AMEL-3000 wonders about the clothes and who they belong to. Do they notice the incrementally superior laundry? they think to themself.

Error. Force boot survey questions. Proceed with first question.

"Miss Yazeba, would you describe this robot's housekeeping services as bad, adequate, or good?"

Amelie isn’t sure that the superior model needs their help.

"Yes. Folding together would be splendid. I will fold the garments that do not require ironing."

This of course includes undergarments, which a robot has no use for.

I AM MORE THANa machine.

"Thank you for your answer. Your honest feedback is important to Amel Corp."

As AMEL-3000 irons, it speeds through the clothes, pleased with how nicely the garments look after being hung up. But as it finishes, AMEL-3000 realizes that it has not kept the ID tags with the clothes and they are now mixed up. Oh no it thinks to itself, Careless mistakes are not tolerated at Amel Corp.In an attempt to distract from the problem, AMEL-3000 loads the next question in the survey as it attempts to match tags to clothing. "Would you purchase this product again?"

Amelie turns to AMEL-3000. "You say honest feedback is important to Amel Corp. But what is important to you?" After a pause, Amelie asks, "Would you like it if people called you Mel?"

Amelie is shocked to hear this.

"Yazeba… you never…?"

Distracted from processing the witch’s kind and principled words, Amelie accidentally burns the clothing she’s ironing! Yet the flame is under control.

Completely under control. Amelie prevents the fire from doing any real damage.

"No, I do not like the name Mel. However... perhaps you could call me Melly? I have always thought that name sounds nice."

Rewrite self reference designator as Melly. Update AMEL-3000 as model name only. ERROR. Personalization request unauthorized.

Self reference designator append Melly. Complete."Perhaps we should begin soaking the kitchen and dining room laundry?" Melly's arms extend out quickly grabbing tablecloths, napkins, more napkins. All deposited gracefully in the soaking vats to begin stripping the cloth.

Resuming customer satisfaction survey.

"Would you recommend this product to a friend, family member, or coworker?" Melly says as its head rotates to look at Yazeba without losing any speed with the laundry. Facial expression capture during the survey responses is important data.
 

"Melly it is!" Amelie is actually not feeling jealous at all of the superior maid-bot.

THIS IS HUMAN. THERE IS ALWAYS A NEXT GENERATION. WHAT MORE CAN THE CURRENT GENERATION HOPE FOR THAN THE SUCCESS OR THEIR SUCCESSORS?

Amelie agrees to Melly’s designated task. "Please wash; I shall dry."

Amelie uses the warm, comforting flame for efficient drying.

Amelie is touched by Yazeba’s words. And it’s not not on the maid-bot that the witch is acknowledging the newfound pyromancy without saying a word of it.

"So… Melly," Amelie starts, though it may be Yazeba who could answer this question. "What brings you to the B-and-B? I am most certainly enjoying this opportunity to work together, but since it has become apparent that you were not purchased… and perhaps, nor I… did you choose to come here? Did AMEL-Corp send you? Or… is there a plausible third option?"