Episode 1: Pradesh

The oversexed faun and the perfumed, drugged-out lady don't know what to make of Ybus. In any case, they don't want to keep the mangy dog on the premises any longer than necessary. Archelaus summons the doorman, a gaudily-dressed dwarf named, Jorgus, who escorts the halfling to the front door and on his way. "Come back anytime!" he says with a wink.



By the time he's out the door, however, Ybus runs out of poutine, and Bruno slinks off into the night.

Ybus, you're standing on the front porch of The Tumescent Faun. The artfully lewd illustration of the satyr on the establishment's sign bears a striking resemblance to the owner that you just met.

What now?

Rydler nods "I will leave the parchment with you then. Have a good night, Lady Aishwarya." With another nod, he begins to depart, passing by the room the child is in, he holds a finger up and heads back to Aishwarya "And do try to keep it down if who you were expecting pays a visit. Or at least, navigate to a room not adjacent to the Child; she needs her sleep." With a final nod "Lady Aishwarya." he departs.

Ybus holds the plate above his head like an umbrella, poutine-side up. He seeks out an isolated alley about 50 feet from the Tumescent Faun, looking for any discarded crates or broken barrels, humming a wordless sea shanty as he does. He looks for a small piece of wood, something he can wrap a bit of string around and tuck into his pocket.

Spending the next 10 minutes humming and wood-finding, Ybus conjures an Unseen Servant. He then breaks the plate across his knee, hands one of the sharpened shards to the servant, and mentally directs it to carve "embellishments" into the illustration, using his own... refined tastes. He finds a comfortable spot in the alley, staying out of sight from his servant's work, and rests for an hour.

Rest fulfilled, Ybus takes his belaying pin and taps his own nose while holding out his other hand, and watches as his body fades from view. Under the effects of the Invisibility spell, Ybus leaves the alley and casually inspects his servant's handiwork, before turning to make his way back to the compound.

Hopefully there are still some leftover samosas.

Ybus volunteers nothing of last night's experience. He hums a bawdy tale involving a merrow, sahuagin, and an unlucky sea cucumber, though of course no words are revealed so it's really left to the imagination that the halfling is referring to those creatures.

Ybus doesn't seem to notice the disappearing pancakes because an Unseen Servant keep plopping them onto his plate. "Ye ain't wantin' to get on 'is bad side, lest ye like lightning bolts wiping your bung hole."

"I have already informed Lady Aishwarya of the bounty on the minotaur's head. Last night, during the choas, I swiped a piece of paper off of a table; it was a letter asking for Copperhorn and Harrison, alive. I assume we need to officially meet him again today, Lady Aishwarya will give him the parchment then."

Rydler tugs on Ybus' earlobe "Manners, Ybus. At least, while at the table, in front of the Child." Using the earlobe tug as a distraction, he also relieves the halfling of another pancake.

"Manner ain't done shigh-t except when knowin' who gets first crack-a-the rum," Ybus complains. "Ey, Kabin-Boi, give me mate s'more of the flappers since he can't be arsed to get his own."

The Unseen Servant dutifully complies, piling pancakes onto Rydler's plate one at a time without stopping.

Ybus winks at the Child. "This linguistic lesson be free to use on yer elders, with the Sea's blessing."

Baracus eats no food this morning, drinking only hot water. Eating 10 lbs. of chilli peppers yesterday has taken a toll on the Half-Orc's digestive system. He makes only nominal grunts of acknowledgement as his friends engage in banter. Baracus is in a sour mood, and it is plain for everyone to see (and smell).
Baracus lowers himself to his hands and knees before the tiny Goddess of War and bows his head three times, as is the custom in Qinglai. Baracus doesn't fuck around with respect.
Baracus is honoured to escort the tiny Goddess, and despite his turbulent stomach and the smell of civilization everywhere, he maintains the outward appearance of calm, but it hangs by mere threads.

A dreadful wailing fills the air as you near the temple of Skandrana (god of war) and Varhu (goddess of protection) who are both one and the same deity. You enter the gates and find yourselves in a courtyard stained with old and fresh blood amid countless devotees pierced by skewers and hung from hooks embedded in their flesh. At first you think the moaning and wailing are cries of pain but when the Golden Child appears the mourning turns to cheering and joyful weeping. Priests rush forward and after the Child blesses them they gently remove the skewers from the avatar's face. All the devotees then free themselves from their own hooks and piercings. Many collapse from fatigue, relief, and blood loss. The Child blesses the congregation, and wounds are soothed if not completely healed. The Child's own smiling face is miraculously unmarred.



Through gestures, and with the chief priest as interpreter, the Golden Child communicates to the congregation that your group saved her life. The awestruck worshipers crowd around you adoringly, fighting amongst themselves for a chance to touch their new heroes.

Erden walks quietly on the other side of the child to watch and make sure that she is truly not bothered by her mutilations. He's not fully satisfied at the end of the walk, but is willing to let it go for now.

When they arrive and start getting crowded in, Erden becomes uncomfortable and yanks on Baracus' hand twice, the sign to lift him up to his shoulders.

Urban takes in the sights of Skandrana Varhu temple. The scene here is undoubtedly shocking, but Urban is used to studying religion and knows that different beliefs lead to wildly different tradition and ceremony.

He wonders what this devotion is all about. In a mix of his own curiosity about the worship system and a slight skepticism about the true intentions of these monks, Urban tries to promote a conversation with one of the lead priests. He asks if he can be taught the basic tenets of the religion with a tour of the temple and some participation or viewing of ceremonies as possible.

"Hey, lassie," Ybus says to the Child, miming hand gestures. "Here's some foine signs t' give folk what ail ya. Remember yer lessons!"

Baracus is deeply moved by the beautiful religious service. The blood, flesh, and lamentations remind him of Gruumshmas back home. It is difficult to be grumpy. He ignores the crowds, but eagerly joins Urban in his discussion with the head priest. He declares in his booming voice:

"I also wish to learn about Skandrana and Varhu!"

At some point in the conversation, Baracus turns to Urban:

"Urban, are your gods as strong as Skandrana and Varhu?"

"I'm not sure," Urban answers Barracus. "These powers seem quite strong," he says as he watches yet another devout and bleeding monk lowered down off of a racking of chain hook skewers.

Urban keeps it to himself that his uncertainty was about which gods he even believed in, much less how strong they were.

"Are you two getting married?" Ybus asks. "I call flower girl!"

Erden smiles at Ybus' outburst and shakes his head. If the halfling hadn't been so damn reliable all these years, Erden would swear that he was totally insane.

After a moment, Erden decides to show respect and places his hands together in front of his chest and offers a bow to both statues and then the child.