Heist the Colours (OOC)

Don't worry too much about how to say it, sometimes more words make better words, so just describe what you want in full detail. 'Works' and 'examples of his craftsmanship' mean about the same thing in English, so maybe you got it right first time?

But I still don't understand what you actually want. He is giving you two 'examples of his craftsmanship' in the form of Johnny B. Good and another aged and genuine looking record for Ronny. Both show what he can do, and, because you are in his shop, and there is time-pressure, you are even getting to see how he does it.

What do you expect to be able to do with these examples?

Nothing more. I'm really good with those two. Raf is not expecting anything else.

It was answer to:
And said answer:
So maybe I should have written it this way:
"If you would be so kind. I would love to have one of your works in my collection too."

??

Because my initial intention was to take the record for Ronny instead of mine(not to be too greedy and wanting form Carl).

I am not sure how adding 'in my collection' changes things? Are you asking for a third record?

Are you saying the Chuck Berry you are getting is not for you?
[ref]
Made it sound like that was for you, but we can pretend you said it was also for someone else if that was what you meant. Or you can say that now and ask for one for yourlsef.

If that is the case, maybe your emphasis was confusing me. Putting it on 'your' made it sound like you wanted something of Carl's (like his original work or music he made himself), if you instead put it on 'I would like...' it might have been clearer that what you were asking for was something for yourself specifically rather than something of his specifically?
If the first one was not for Raf you did not indicate that at all in the RP, so Carl would be confused, but we can pretend that language confusion did not happen.

We can also blame my subtlty when I had Carl say he could 'throw in your request for free' [ref]. I meant the record you had requested that he said he did not have genuine, old printings of. He is offering to make you a print.

Tell us how many records you are asking for (and what they are). This is a 20,000 Credit deal, he won't quibble over some replicas and spent plastic and cardboard.

Wow... my English is probably very bad if there is so much confusion:( Well I will try to explain it again, how I see current things:
1) When Raf entered shop, he asked Chuck Berry for himself.
2) Then Carl offered package shipping job - for Cr 20 000(completely different vinyl)
3) Then Carl revealed that he can add "fake" Chuck Berry for free as the bonus for doing the job.
4) Then Raf asked(but that wasn't probably clear 'cause my bad English:( ) if he can make a vinyl for Ronny - and I(and Raf) was thinking it will be instead of Chuck Berry for Raf - so 2 vinyls so far
5) Then Carl said that if Raf will wait 20 minutes for vinyl that is meant for the job(I presume because of changing desired direction) he will also add fake Chuck Berry for free for Raf
6) Raf said that that would be great, but wanted to underscore that the reason he is happy about that is because it is "work"/"opus" of Carl, rather just fake Vinyl of Chuck Berry - so finally 3 vinyls

Raf don't expect anything else. Just waits.

If you meant that Ronny's X Album and Raf's Chuck Berry album were meant to be paid - Raf is not expecting them to cost as much as 20k... of course.

Now tell me how it is, and what I haven't understand please.

And by "so finally 3 vinyls" I mean:
- Chuck Berry for Raf
- X album for Ronny
- Z vinyl for the job.

Ah, I see. You weren't asking for another one, you were just being polite. (so: 'too' was the confusing word in there, it implied 'addition').

Fine, no problem.

The price is for getting them where they need to go. Carl does not seem at all concerned about being paid (is that suspicious?).

Good I managed to explain what I meant at least. Really sorry for bringing in so much confusion:(

So what would be the best way to write what I meant? Something like:
"If you would be so kind. I would love to also have one of your works in my collection."

??
Yes it is. But that's part of the fun :)

The 'best' way if often to explain what you are trying to do.

'"If you would be so kind. I would love to have one of your works too." - says Rafael' might be better explained by '"If you would be so kind. I would love to have one of your works too." Rafael says in thanks' making it clear you are thanking him rather than asking for something. Or, possibly better '"If you would be so kind." Rafael thanks Carl "I would love to have one of your works too." says Rafael' to separate the first part (the thanks linking to what Carl said) from the second part (showing how impressed you are). But it is subtle.

In this case 'best' might have been to not worry about what you were trying to say and to just directly answer the question 'Is this different from the two records he is making and ageing for you already?' with 'No, just those two'.

Thanks for those remarks. I can learn from them:)

Yes, probably answering this question would be best, but I didn’t understand where was the problem in my text. So wanted to explain and be sure that now I was understood correctly. But probably it is also true that I’m too much focused on showing my intentions of "mood"/flavour that I wanted to bring with my words. Thanks!

I think we can skip forward to when we pick up Raf? Unless someone wants to add something.

I was going to ask almost the same. Are we waiting for someone or something? How is Carl doing with his records?

How do we want to pick up Raf? Does Raf come out to the car, or do some of the others go into Carl's shop? If the first then we can just say that happened and move on.

Where is the new computer? What do we need to overcome to get in, or to get it?

@WhtKnt, are you happy with the amount that Cat has been involved? I would like to see more from her and you if you can.

Shall we engineer a way that put Cat front-and-center at the start of the new heist? Maybe as a distraction again? Or (by) using her Skills? (Maybe some of: Advocate, Blade, Broker, Carouse, Deception, Electronics, Gambler, Mechanic, Persuade, Recon; could be useful, off the top of my head.)

Understood. That is why I did not push before. Give us what you can, let us know if you want more or less spotlight.
Only if you want to, though. We can leave Cat mostly in the background --as we have been-- till you are ready for a greater commitment.
Indeed. Can you suggest ways to bring those in? We can build the scene around these ideas.

Deception is pretty obvious, but Gambler could be interesting if we find a way (possibly as an unrolled Skill in the background explaining a connection to someone there?). Recon and Persuade have obvious secondary value in such a scene, and this is, presumably, an Electronics site, so that Skill could help you navigate the waters as well.

I think we mentioned somewhere that it shouldn't be a second heist. And another trade deal seems a bit boring to me. So, I was thinking, how about this computer comes with a new passenger? Someone we need to drop off somewhere in exchange for using the computer.

Ronny only said they would 'pick up' this new PC. So technically it wouldn't have been a lie. He never said Abby would own it.

Sure, if the others want to go for that.
Wow! No wonder she dumped you. :)

If Ronny is too cheap to pay for it, Cat will contribute.

The computer is a Prototype, and not something we can 'buy', else Abby would just have bought it herself.

It might be interesting for Cat to come to Abby's defence when Ronny tries to weasel out of his promise?